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When You're Told You Look Good, Even Though You Feel Bad

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Most of us living with chronic pain hear this or something similar every now and again. And it is sometimes when we are feeling our worst. And we think, how on Earth can anyone possibly think we are looking good?

Sometimes it annoys and angers us. We may wonder if they realize just how bad we are feeling. More to the point, do they even care?

We are feeling so bad. In so much pain. Hardly slept. Haven’t even mustered up the energy to run a comb through our hair, yet they say, “You’re looking good!” Honestly, how can they say that? How can they possibly think that? Can they not see how we are feeling? Can they not see that our pain is through the roof, at an all-time high right now? Can they not see that every muscle is hurting? That every bone in our bodies hurt….can’t they see that? That every step hurts so much that we are ready to just collapse in a heap?

So why do people actually say it? Perhaps some genuinely don’t notice that we’re in pain. Or perhaps they do and simply don’t know what to say. Or perhaps they think that by paying us a compliment, it might make us feel a little bit better, so they are actually trying to help us.

And who knows, maybe sometimes we really do look good!

Doesn’t everyone enjoy a compliment? Doesn’t it give everyone a wee morale boost just to be told that they are looking good? And let’s face it, as people with chronic pain, we need all the morale boosts we can get.

So maybe the next time someone tells me that I am looking good, I should embrace it and enjoy it.

In fact, we shouldn’t just sit around waiting for someone to come along and say it. Perhaps we should take a look in the mirror right now and smile at what we see, and tell ourselves that we’re looking good. It’s not so difficult. The difficult part might be in believing it. Practice though…practice.

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Lead photo by Thinkstock Images.

Originally published: November 16, 2016
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