A Response to Antidepressant Commercials

I don’t understand antidepressant commercials.

How it starts with blue lighting,

while living with depression

is more like a monochrome gray.

Looking sadly out the window at the bright world outside,

I wonder who the hell actually does that?

How does someone with debilitating depression

even claw themselves out of bed,

fix their hair and makeup to perfection,

and look out the window?

On days I still have energy after getting dressed,

I use it to fake a smile,

and on the days I don’t – I can’t – bare to look outside

at the colors I never get to feel

at the people who don’t have trouble finding a reason to smile

at the world that manages just fine.

Then comes the pill itself —

what are you doing?

Nobody gets that happy about taking medicine,

it tastes bitter.

And while I welcome the bitterness

over the nothingness that life tastes like,

I hate taking medication.

I hate my ability to function

is tied to something covered in warning labels.

And then,

the whole world turns into a radiant wonderland.

And everything is absolutely fine.

Is depression just a switch to you?

Something you can turn on and off?

Like someone would choose this?

This inability to live happily?

Not even being able to try?

Depression isn’t something you can cure with money.

Depression can’t be fixed between scenes.

Depression doesn’t go away within thirty seconds of sappy music and jump cuts.

Depression isn’t a show.

And your commercial

certainly doesn’t give me

any breaks.

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