Psychedelics Changed My Life as a Mom Battling Postpartum Depression

Ten years ago, if someone had told me I’d be advocating for a clinical trial using psychedelics to treat postpartum depression, I would have found it hard to believe.  At the time, the idea seemed completely out of reach.  But everything changed when I started a family with my husband, Daniel, and my journey with psychedelic mushrooms began.

During my pregnancy with my daughter, Lola, I had no way of knowing what was ahead. After she was born, the baby blues lingered far longer than I had expected. I began to withdraw from friends and family, feeling less social and far from the upbeat person I once was. I reassured myself that this was just part of becoming a new mom—an adjustment to the profound shift in life. After all, isn’t that what everyone says is normal?

Everything shifted when I became pregnant with my second child, Ramsey. This time, the experience was much more challenging—both physically and emotionally. I struggled with sciatica, which severely limited my ability to stay active, unlike during my pregnancy with Lola. As someone who has always identified as an athlete, I relied on activities like kickboxing and biking to keep me grounded. Losing that outlet took a toll on me.

As my pregnancy progressed, my doctors recommended antidepressants, but I resisted. I told myself I just needed to push through- that once the baby arrived, everything would fall into place.  I clung to the belief that this was temporary, that I could endure it a little longer.

But the relief I hoped for never came after Ramsey was born. In the first couple of weeks, I felt a slight improvement, but soon, the darkness crept back in. By the time I reached my six-week postpartum checkup, my doctor confirmed what I had been struggling to admit – I had postpartum depression (PPD), a serious mental health condition that can occur after childbirth.

PPD wasn’t just an extension of the baby blues; it was something deeper, heavier.  I felt drained to my core, disconnected from my baby, and trapped in a relentless fog that refused to lift.  Once again, my doctor recommended antidepressants along with therapy.  But I hesitated. I wasn’t ready to take that step.

For some, antidepressants can be a powerful tool, but I couldn’t shake my concerns.  I worried about potential side effects, especially suicidal thoughts something I was already battling- and the risk of becoming dependent. Therapy, particularly cognitive behavioral therapy, was another option at the time, I simply didn’t have the emotional bandwidth to commit to it.  I felt stuck, trapped in a cycle I didn’t know how to break.

As the years went by, my husband and I found ourselves in couples therapy—not just to work through the strain my depression had placed on our marriage, but also to ensure I had someone looking out for me professionally.  Yet, despite our efforts, I still wasn’t finding the relief I so desperately needed.

Then, one day, I stumbled upon a podcast discussing the potential of psychedelic therapies for mental health conditions like PTSD and depression. Something clicked. For the first time in a long time, I felt a spark of hope.  I immersed myself in research about psilocybin, a naturally occurring compound in certain mushrooms, and its promising effects for people living with mental health challenges. After careful thought and long conversations, my husband and I decided to try it.

Getting started was not easy. Microdosing required a lot of patience, and I wasn’t sure what to expect. But just three days in, something shifted. I found myself sitting on the floor, playing with my son—really playing. I was fully present with him in a way I hadn’t been in years. My husband noticed, too. He stopped what he was doing and just stared, amazed. It was a small moment, but it marked the beginning of something life changing.

Motherhood comes with immense pressure—the expectation to be perfect, to soak in every moment, and to love every second of it. But for me, and so many others struggling with postpartum depression, it wasn’t magical. It was exhausting.  It was isolating. I felt like I was failing, especially because none of my friends ever talked about feeling this way. I didn’t realize then just how common PPD is—it affects 1 in 7 women after childbirth. And yet, so many of us suffer in silence.

For me, trying psychedelic mushrooms was a turning point. It gave me my life back. They helped me reconnect with my family and myself. Now, we go on adventures together, creating memories I can fully experience and cherish.  I’ve also learned the importance of maintaining my mental health through daily habits like staying active and practicing mindfulness.

But my journey with psychedelics for postpartum depression wasn’t easy to navigate, which is why I’m excited about a groundbreaking clinical trial.  The RECONNECT clinical trial, led by Reunion Neuroscience, is exploring a single dose investigational treatment similar to psilocybin for women experiencing postpartum depression.  This study has the potential to be revolutionary- offering hope to women like me who haven’t responded to or want alternatives to traditional treatments.

I’ve become an advocate for women with postpartum depression because I know firsthand how isolating and difficult it can be.  Depression doesn’t discriminate. I had every advantage—a supportive husband, health insurance, a stable job, and a close-knit family—and I still struggled. That’s why I believe we need more options for treatment. Women deserve better.

Why choose the RECONNECT Study?

• You are contributing to groundbreaking research that will help shape the future of maternal mental health care.
• Your participation will help advance scientific understanding and support the development of new, effective therapies such as a new rapid-acting therapy for PPD
• You will receive comprehensive care to ensure your safety and well-being.
• You will be compensated for your time and travel.

Together, you and others can drive innovation, offer hope, and improve the lives of mothers worldwide.

I understand the hesitation around psychedelics—the stigma, the fear of the unknown, and the uncertainty about how they might affect you. I had those same fears.  I worried they might change me in ways I couldn’t control.  But instead, they helped me rediscover myself.

Motherhood is a journey, and for some of us, it comes with unexpected challenges that can feel overwhelming. If you’re struggling, please know you are not alone. There is hope. With new treatments on the horizon, we are finally moving towards more options, more understanding, and more paths to healing.

 

 

If you or someone you know needs help, you can visit our suicide prevention resources page. If you need support right now, please call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or text “START” to 741-741 to reach the Crisis Text Line.

 Thanks for being here.