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When Anxiety's Blindfold Finally Came Off

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Anxiety. The word itself contains so many painful memories, events and even friends and loved ones I unconsciously pushed away because of feelings I verbally expressed. I was befuddled by the hurt behind the words I spoke or the thoughts I just let out without any reason or intent of hurting another. It literally took a friend to stop me, tap me on the shoulder and say, “Hey, what you’re doing is hurtful and I feel like it is just pushing me away.”

It was at that very moment, I was unfolded with this blindfold that was rotting away on my face, infusing within my skin and rotting away my very ability to keep others close to me. I didn’t realize that until that very moment I was unfolded.

Anxiety. It’s a word that does not define me, but there is no denying it is in my life. It will never define me. And now that I am unfolded I pray every night whole heatedly I break this habit of assuming and accusing, and hope to get better at thinking before I say something. It’s been four days, and it’s been a hard, but slowly it’s a habit I’m breaking.

I’m glad I am unfolded and no longer living behind a blindfold. This means I can grow and work on being the very best person I was born to be.

So anxiety, you will not block my vision. I am slowly but surely seeing the negative affects you have been having in my life, and even though I can’t defeat you just yet, I am getting stronger each and every day, praying for strength and getting ready for war.

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Getty image via NADOFOTOS

Originally published: January 4, 2018
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