The Bill of Rights of Parents Who Have Lost a Child
1. I have the right to grieve for however long I need to, even if others think I should “get over it.”
2. I have the right to mention my child, even if it makes others uncomfortable.
3. I have the right to find comfort in my Faith, even if others disagree with what I believe.
4. I have the right to treasure my children’s pictures and belongings, even if some think I should hide them away or discard them.
5. I have the right to avoid social gatherings I know will trigger more pain for me, even though some people may miss me.
6. I have the right to find solace in dreams in which my child appears, even if the beliefs of others take offense.
7. I have the right to share my Faith which has sustained me in my deep sorrow, even if others have different beliefs.
8. I have the right to not be gossiped about behind my back about the way in which I mourn, even if others think they are helping me by talking about me.
9. I have the right to not share things about my child that I hold close to my heart, even if others think I should.
10. I have the right to cry, even if it embarrasses someone who is with me.
11. I have the right to smile, even if some may think I shouldn’t.
12. I have the right to visit my child’s grave and remain there as long as I need and want to, even if others would prefer I be elsewhere.
13. I have the right to not celebrate Holidays, even if others don’t understand why.
14. I have the right to not have to explain to others what if feels like to have buried my child, even if another wants to know.
15. I have the right to express my sorrow in whatever artistic manner I choose, even if others don’t like my expression.
16. I have the right to believe I will see my child again, even if others do not share that same hope.
17. I have the right to believe that in God’s Spirit I am still one with my child, even if others can’t understand this or have been taught differently.
18. I have the right to work through feelings of fear and anger at my own pace, even if some don’t agree with those feelings.
19. I have the right to see the world differently in my grief, even if others don’t see it the same way.
20. I have the right to perceive life and death differently, even if some think I have “gone off the deep end.”
21. I have the right to speak of my child as if he still exists, because he does, even if some judge me for doing so.
22. I have the right to choose if I need medication or not.
23. I have the right to grieve, even if some would prefer I “cheer up.”
24. I have the right to violate my rights at any time, even if some make accusations when I do so.
Jude’s book, “Gifts from the Ashes,” is available at Direct Textbook.
Follow this journey on Jude’s website.
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Thinkstock image by marako85
I am the Author of ‘Gifts from the Ashes’. Here is a Review/Summary of my book to assist: An honest and straightforward auto-biography which includes a Bereaved Mom’s personal Testimony, 183 Topics, Scriptures of Comfort, and her deceased son’s poems. It offers Hope and Redemption to others on this journey of Grief. It is approximately 370 pages with a beautiful design and internal layout. It can also be utilized in group discussions easily because of the manner in which the Topics are presented. The Author has been a Pastor’s wife, a counselor at a treatment center in a hospital, a counselor at a private clinic, has worked numerous hotlines and at shelters for the abused, sat on the board of a major city rape crisis center for 3 yrs., had designed her own program on shame-reduction which she taught at a women’s center, facilitated many groups, raised 4 natural born children along with an adopted child and a foster child, has had 4 pregnancy losses, and was barren for 7 yrs. while being told by doctors that she could not have children. It’s a remarkable story of Hope & Redemption. She became an ordained minister 2/06. She currently operates an on line informative and supportive group for bereaved parents and continues to write new topics on WordPress. This is her 1st book. She intends to publish a 2nd in the future focused on a 24 yr. abusive marriage. I highly recommend it. Articles on WordPress.com: https://wordpress.com/posts/bereavedparentsblog.wordpress.com. I am the author of all articles and using them, or any portion of them, without my written permission is against copyright law. Registration# TX 8-383-134
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