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Please Don't Judge a Lupus Warrior's Health Choices

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Dear concerned citizen,

This may come as a surprise, but your advice is not always solicited, warranted or helpful in a lupus warrior’s fight. It can sometimes be overwhelming and obnoxious to say the least.

It’s easy for someone to tell you not to take the medications – they are only making you sicker. It’s easy for someone to tell you that the pharmaceutical companies are making money on creating medications that make you dependent on them. It’s easy for people to pass judgment because you choose to take the medications that keep you alive and operational. It’s easy for people to say you should just go with natural products, or just smoke marijuana, or simply change your eating habits and you’ll be cured. It’s easy for people to say your doctor is taking you for a ride, pumping you with medicine that is obviously not working because you are still sick.

It’s easy when you are not battling day to day. When you don’t have to fight to do simple things like get up, brush your teeth, interact with your family. It’s easy when you don’t know anything about what lupus does to a body and how it can ravish and destroy the little soul left after pain killed the rest. It’s easy to say things that don’t help but hurt, or to speak without thinking about how it will affect the person who is not just sick but chronically ill.

Dear concerned citizen, it’s not easy to make the health choices you must make to survive to live a normal life in spite of lupus. It’s not easy to come to the conclusion that your life is forever changed by something that can potentially take your last breath. It’s not as easy as just doing a, b, c or d. If it was ,we would do it all simply and enjoy a cure. So many people give advice with no knowledge or skills that can assist. It can be frustrating, heartbreaking and painful to endure.

So, before you decide to give unsolicited medical advice, please take a moment to think before you speak, know before you make judgments and learn before you tell others how they should take care of their own health. Your support is appreciated, your judgment and lack of knowledge of what my health care needs are is not.

Love as we fight,

Lupus warriors worldwide

This post originally appeared on Lupus in Color.

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Originally published: December 4, 2017
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