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When I Couldn't Pretend Any Longer I Was the 'Perfect' Mom

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I — like I imagine other moms — want everyone to think I have it together. I want others to think my house runs like a well oiled machine, homeschooling is easy, I am super mom to a child with a disability and a perfect wife.

I post pictures that angle out the mess in my living room. I wipe faces and brush hair for “candid” shots. I’ve even been guilty of setting up a “candid” shot.

And then it hit me, people think I’m this perfect example of “momming.” People didn’t see the depression and caregiver burn-out coming because, well, everything seemed “perfect.”

It wasn’t — and it isn’t.

When I had an emotional break down due to lack of self-care, people seemed shocked. Some even didn’t believe me. I was hurting and I created it myself. No longer! I am the real me in real life and social media.

I am a mismatched clothes, mom bun, messy house, wild kids mom. It is the biggest relief to allow myself permission to be me. I have allowed myself permission to show my real life. And you know what? People have responded positively. Friends have opened up to me about their personal struggles. I have bonded with other mothers because they see themselves in my reality. We don’t try to out “Pinterest mom” each other. We are real, raw and perfectly imperfect.

Originally published: December 5, 2017
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