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#pleasehelp #motherspain #desparate #needadvice
My daughter has had a coach for volleyball that has not liked her or given her a chance since she met her. It started last year in 7th grade she transferred to this new school to get away from the bullying there. She didn’t make the team. Ok no biggie we will go out next year (8th grade) the same coach called and begged me to put her in club ball. After being contacted 3 times I decided I would literally scrape the money to get her in if it was something she wanted to do and show her sportsmanship, teamwork, discipline and mostly give her confidence where she had previously been torn down. We went through the season and the coach was so hard on her and didn’t scorn anyone the way she did my daughter. When I say coach I mean she’s over the club ball. The coach she actually had for it knew nothing about volleyball except that it was volleyball. Grateful she volunteered but it didn’t benefit her to play at all except she got to play. Well then came tryouts for 8th Grade this year. No one was cut like last year but she told my daughter she judged on 9 things and the only thing she was good at was speed. She’s played for years in rec ball but all the girls on her school team have done club for years. She was told she “could” be on the team but not guaranteed play time. We were ok bc we figured at least she would get practice and was told that if anyone was hurt she would be moved up. That’s not the case they move 7th graders up and leave her sitting the bench. I was upset when I was told no one was cut but she couldnt guarantee time for my daughter. Well practice is 2hours every day except the two game days a week. My daughter is often not included in practice and since school started in August she has played less than 8 minutes. This is also a pay to play sport and you have to pay for a ticked to get in not to mention the drive to games an hour away. Also family coming to watch her play also paying and using gas. This has broken my daughter in spirits, confidence and self worth. My daughter now suffers depression and comes home just to go spend the day in her room. Totally not like her. I am in my bpd cycle and this too has severely impacted my depression/mood as her mother seeing how it’s affecting her. I have talked to the athletic director who told me to talk to coach. I talked to coach and again she basically downed my daughter that it’s her fault and she’s not good enough. “How can that be when u don’t practice her and you don’t play her but out of the 8 mins she’s played she’s walking on pins and needles afraid to make a mistake before she even gets on the court”? I got nowhere except feeling more defeated. I don’t know what to do but letting it all build up I afraid to explode. And with bpd I don’t have a filter when I’m sick. I want to do right by my daughter. Everyone is saying if I was her mother then another one is saying she needs to earn her place. Please I’m desperate anything would be appreciated.
