The gift that kept on hurting
I had a really nice car for my first car. Bc it was so nice and I wasn’t paying for it I was suppose to ignore the abusive/narasitic behavior of my parents. A guilt gift if you may call it.
I was ashamed every time The burden of having it got too much. Like I begged for something like this. That was way out of their price range and that I know we could barely afford.
The crazy part was I wanted a second hand car that was barely a 3rd of the cost for this car. He bought it on a whim to make me happy. Like he’s been doing my whole life...
I still feel guilty for feeling the way that I did. I tried giving the car back on numberous occasions. Currently I no longer have the car and I am still trying to heal from all of that... 3 years of being treated like I was ungrateful for a burden I was thrown into, for asking for help when knowing they was paying for my car they gave to me, and having to deal that working and earning my degree. I was sooo burned out I don’t think I have recovered yet.
I seen this In my memories from this month 3 years ago. I thought I was happy but I really was just ignoring how I was really feeling. #narasiticabuse #Depression #toxicparents