Hi everyone,

I’m new here and grateful to have found this space.

I’m looking for ideas and shared experiences that could help my girlfriend and me grow together while navigating the effects of her PTSD.

We’ve known each other for over four years with strong mutual attraction, but our relationship deepened last August. But after about three months of closeness, a panic attack to realize being in a relation shifted things — she began to feel overwhelmed by the intensity and developed strong urges to pull away.

Since then, it’s been a cycle of connection and distance. She’s actively in therapy, which I deeply respect, but during more intense phases, she becomes emotionally withdrawn, sometimes reactive — even humiliating me in public or dismissing any gentle reflection I try to offer. Still, when we’re connected and calm, we share beautiful moments full of warmth, laughter, and safety.

I want to emphasize: this isn’t about blaming. It is so much caring. I’m aware that trauma expresses itself in ways that are protective, even when it seems hurtful. I also bring my own patterns into the relationship. I grew up with a mother who had her own unresolved trauma — which left me with self-worth challenges and a tendency to overthink. So, while I get emotionally shaken at times, I’ve also developed strong coping skills. In some ways, I think we understand each other’s pain.

Now, I’d love to ask you — both those living with PTSD and those supporting a partner — a few questions based on where we are now and what will work well according to your experience - such a kind of partner experience exchange:

Would it be helpful to move difficult conversations into a written form (like email or messages), rather than trying to solve things live in person? I feel it might give us both time to reflect and reduce the emotional charge — preserving our precious “hygge” moments together. Has anyone tried this?

Have any of you had positive experiences with joining a partner’s therapy sessions from time to time? Her therapist seems to be someone she respects and who challenges her in a constructive way. I don’t want to intrude, but I wonder if sharing one or two sessions could build understanding on both sides?

Any thoughts, advice, or personal stories would be appreciated.

Thanks for listening — and sending a smile to whoever needs one today. 😊

Cheers Happy2Gether

#PTSD #ptsdpartners #PTSD -together-healing #PTSD -tricks