To the Neighbor I Saw While Feeling Socially Anxious at the Grocery Store

Dear Neighbor,

I saw you at the grocery store the other day in the bread aisle. I wanted to make sure you didn’t see me, though I’m pretty sure you did. We briefly made eye contact. You may have shifted your grocery cart toward my direction, but I was looking away panicked that you might have picked up on my nervousness. But I’m not certain.

Before we had a chance to let the encounter go any further, I bolted and went to the personal care aisle. (It’s important to note I didn’t need actually need anything from the personal care aisle.) Based on my reaction you may be surprised to learn that I like you. In fact, you’re one of the few neighbors I feel comfortable around. We wave to each other from time to time, and we might stop and chit-chat as we walk our dogs. So you might be wondering why in the world I would avoid you at the grocery store?

It’s not my fault, but still entirely my fault at the same time. While I feel the courage to approach you and say the occasional “hello” at home, I was not prepared for that day we ran into each other in front of the sandwich bread. I have the ability to better prepare for social encounters when I’m on my own turf — I am able to anticipate who might “surprise” me with a casual conversation. I can then muster the courage to interact when I feel the time is right. I can even come up with a few topics of conversation in advance so I’m not caught off guard, stumbling over my words (or worse — contending with awkward silence).

But a random encounter places me out of my comfort zone. It’s unexpected. I don’t have time to prepare what to say. I’m nervous about my appearance, the way I might sound and ramble on. Heck, you might even judge me for the items that are in my grocery cart for all I know.

“I thought she was staying away from gluten? Didn’t she say she was a vegetarian? Oh my gosh, I can’t believe she’s got those cookies in her cart!”