This Viral TikTok Video of a Dad Smashing His Kids’ Things Isn’t Funny — It's Abusive
Editor's Note
If you have experienced emotional abuse, the following post could be potentially triggering. You can contact the Crisis Text Line by texting “START” to 741741.
Last week, a TikTok video of a seemingly enraged dad smashing his kids’ belongings went viral. The video, which you can see below, shows the dad using a baseball bat to destroy his kids’ TV and video game controllers, while yelling at them for not doing their chores.
“What the crap?” he says in the video, while the children cower on their beds. “Buy yourself a new TV by doing chores.”
Toxic parenting or nah? pic.twitter.com/1VYL04FvsT
— Dretoven (@Blackkout__) April 30, 2020
After viewers began expressing their concerns over the safety of the children, the father posted a follow up video stating that the whole thing was a skit. He explained the TV and gaming devices he smashed were broken prior to filming the video and he already had plans to buy his kids new electronics.
“None of it was real so peace out,” he says in the follow up video. “Hope you all treat your kids good because I am and they love me very much.”
Fake News! pic.twitter.com/ljXSeWb52Y
— KEEM ???? (@KEEMSTAR) April 30, 2020
If that was a skit, someone give this guy an Academy Award for Best Actor because that didn’t look scripted. What I saw was a parent taking his anger out on his children and their things in a destructive and violent way. Frankly, it was terrifying to watch. The children were visibly and audibly scared and frozen on the bed and I found myself recoiling out of discomfort at witnessing the display of violence.
First off, what on earth possessed this father to think it was a good idea to document and share a video like this, real or fake? Secondly, why did he feel the need to justify his behavior in a subsequent video if he was so sure that filming and distributing this video was acceptable social media content?
Whether or not the video captured something real or staged, it was wildly inappropriate to share. Normalizing violence is unacceptable. Many children regularly experience horrendous violence at the hands of their parents and no amount of telling them you were “just kidding” will make them feel safer.
As a child who regularly saw my mother harm herself and occasionally others, I know how terrifying it feels to witness your parent behave like they are out of control. A child relies on their parent to survive. If a parent is volatile, children learn very quickly what not to say or do to provoke a parent so they can feel safe. Growing up walking on eggshells like this taught me that I didn’t matter, my negative feelings were bad and that it was my responsibility to make sure my mother was OK — not the other way around. What an incredibly selfish thing to do to a child.
To the dad in the video, I don’t care if you buy those kids 20 new televisions, PlayStations or iPads. Material things will not create a sense of security or fill the void of a stable reliable caretaker. I hope this video was a one-time mistake, and you learn from the comments you received. Kids need love and a home where they can feel completely at ease being fully themselves without fear of retribution.
Screenshots via @brianwells02 TikTok