Why My Brain Fog Feels Like a Light Switch


The process of recovering from neurological Lyme disease kind of feels like having a light switch controlling your brain.

When the lights are on, you can actually accomplish stuff. However, at any given moment the lights can flicker, dim, or simply be turned off. You never know when that switch will be flipped off, or when or if it’ll be flipped back on.

It’s a constant state of uncertainty, unpredictability. The thing about recovering is that you take a minute to be frustrated here and there, then get back to appreciating every glimmer of light you receive, whether it be bright, so very dimmed, or a flickering mess. Because when it comes down to it, any of those options are better than the dark.

The human brain is an extraordinary, peculiar mystery. Every time that light dims for me, as I’m sitting there wondering when or if it’ll return again, I have to remind myself of how unbelievably lucky I am to have come this far since beginning my treatment journey seven years ago.

Life with neurological Lyme makes for a lot of things: fear, unpredictability, and continuous obstacles, but most of all, an intense gratitude for the little things.

If you were able to read this without any thought of a metaphorical switch turning off your “lights” at any moment, take a moment to appreciate your brain, and your health. While you work on that, I’ll take an extra deep breath and get back to writing my school assignment, with a very dimmed, uncontrollably flickering light of a brain.

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Thinkstock Image By: Vlad_Alex

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