A Break-Up Letter to My Lyme Disease

You came into my life without my consent, and once you were there you stayed. I had no choice but to live with you.

I tell myself “be patient,” but you test my patience every minute of every day.

I tell myself “relax,” but you give me intense anxiety and panic attacks.

I tell myself “I’m fine,” but you make my mind jumbled and my body no longer mine.

You are selfish. You take and take but never give.

I wear a mask when I go out. I look fine. But under my skin, you are killing me.

No one can fully understand what you have done to me, except me.

I understand now how you operate. How you sneak in and manipulate. How you find my weak spots and force your way in. How you try to control and unravel every inch of me.

I used to wish we never met, but I realize now it’s for the best. You wrecked my mind, body, and spirit, but I’m stronger than you, and stronger than I thought I could be. I needed you to realize this, but I don’t need you any longer. You have served your purpose. You are free to go.

And if you come back, I will meet you at the door laughing. I’m not the same person as I was before.

So thank you, but now please stay away.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Photo via Unsplash by Sasha Freemind

Find this story helpful? Share it with someone you care about.

Related to Lyme Disease

woman sitting on couch with doctor holding clipboard

When I Met a Lyme Disease Specialist for the First Time

The recent legislation change in Iowa, which allows doctors in Iowa to prescribe treatment for Lyme disease that is more aggressive than currently allowed by the state’s Board of Medicine, has given me hope that these changes will be massively cropping up in all states sooner rather than later. Doctors who treat Lyme disease often put their [...]
Woman eating lunch alone.

When People at Work Avoid You Because of Your Illness

You want to say that you just imagined it, that the room did not suddenly become quiet when you walked in. But you know that you didn’t imagine it because this has happened before. You were out sick last week, like half of your office coworkers, but with one difference – you didn’t get better. [...]

How Violin Music Has Guided Me Through the Dark Times of Illness

I don’t know what time it is, hell, I don’t know what day it is. All I know is that it’s dark, the cold breath of night hanging over my windows. My rib cage is rising and falling, automatic, the bones sharp and bendy. I can’t see much and my body is contorted with pain, [...]
woman sitting on her bed and looking out the window

What Life as a 'Functioning Lymie' Looks Like on Days You Don't See Me

I look fine. I may seem fine. I probably sound fine. There are some new photos on Facebook from a couple weeks ago of me out with friends, smiling and having fun, having a few days of normalcy that are momentous and rare to me, but would probably not be a big deal for others – just a [...]