5 Things I Didn't Know Would Come With My Anxiety

The Anxiety & Depression Association of America describes anxiety as people who, “experience excessive anxiety and worry, often expecting the worst even when there is no apparent reason for concern.”

But what they didn’t tell me was that along with excessive worry and constant fight-or-flight responses, would come a large number of other problems. Here are five ways I didn’t know my anxiety would affect me.

1. I doubt nearly every relationship I have.

From friendships, to romantic relationships, to family members, to co-workers, whether I’ve known a person for a week or a decade, I will doubt my relationship with them.

“What if they are just pretending? Do they only spend time with me because they pity me? How do I know they’ll stay with me? Is my anxiety too much for them?”

Unfortunately, I’ve lost or damaged several relationship because of my anxiety. I don’t intend to do this, but my brain goes off on a vicious cycle and anyone can turn into someone who I could be offending.

2. Schoolwork is five times harder.

I used to have 4.0 GPA. It has dropped since anxiety hit. With every single word I write, my anxiety finds a way for it to be wrong. If I don’t immediately know the answer to something, I am instantly flooded by the feeling that I am an inadequate human. Is this true? Absolutely not! This is work I know I am able to do, but my anxiety tells me I will never be right, no matter how hard I try.

3. I’m constantly exhausted.

I take naps nearly every day now. Anxiety wears a person out. It takes all my energy.  I didn’t realize having intense emotions takes a toll on your energy.

4. I doubt my faith.

I am afraid to believe. I’m terrified of judgment. My anxiety has made me believe I don’t deserve forgiveness or salvation. I live in fear and worry.

5. My house is a mess.

I feel like I have no time on my hands. Dirty dishes and messy countertops can be found in my kitchen. My bathroom is a disorganized disaster, and piles of dirty clothes are everywhere.

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Thinkstock photo by Kichigin