The Mighty Logo

What I Need as a Person With Anxiety, but I'm Afraid to Ask For

I take my medication and go to sleep. I wake up every morning knowing I’m going to worry.

Yes, it is a part of my daily life and it is not the most enjoyable thing, but I don’t need pity and I personally don’t need to be defined by my anxiety. Most of the time I am too afraid to tell my loved ones what I need from them, but all I need is support and a listening ear. I don’t need you to rid me of my anxiety. I don’t need you to feel bad for me. I need someone to try and understand me.

I freak out sometimes and by sometimes, I mean a lot. I want my friends to know I know my thoughts are irrational. I know I’m overreacting and because of that, I feel like a burden to you. When you ask me what I need, I will always say nothing because I assume you are just trying to be nice and I do not want to bother you. When you ask me to let you know if I need your help, I’m never going to reach out because I do not want to bother you. When you try to assure me you are always there for me, I will still hold in my emotions because I do not want to bother you. I do not want you to be annoyed by me and every time I apologize for annoying you, I feel like I am just annoying you more. This is the negative thought cycle my anxiety provides me with. This turns into me isolating myself, which turns in to depression. It’s truly a vicious cycle and I wish I felt comfortable reaching out to you. I don’t know why I don’t. You try and I try, but I do not want to bother you.

If I could tell all my friends what I truly need, this is what I would say. I need you to be the one to reach out sometimes. It doesn’t have to be daily, but just ask me how I am doing every so often. This will take some pressure off me and make me feel like less of a nuisance. When you do reach out, I do not need you to find a solution. I just hope you can be there to support me and listen to me without judgment. Sometimes I will tell you the “craziest” worries, but please don’t treat me like I’m “crazy.” I put myself down enough. Sometimes I won’t tell you anything I’m feeling because I’m too afraid. Please don’t get too frustrated. I am more than frustrated that this is the way my brain works, but I’m doing my best.

Please know this is only a part of me and the best thing you could do is reach out to me every once in a while. If you don’t, that’s OK too — I don’t want to bother you.

We want to hear your story. Become a Mighty contributor here.

Thinkstock photo via dragana991

Want more of The Mighty?
You can find even more stories on our Home page. There, you’ll also find thoughts and questions by our community.
Take Me Home