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How I Found Purpose in Life After My Bipolar Diagnosis

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Finding purpose in a life with bipolar disorder and various other mental illnesses is not easy. I had no aim in life. I was born, I grew up under the shelter of my parents and then suddenly I was pushed into the real world when my mother passed away.

• What is Bipolar disorder?

I gave up my college life. I gave up on my jobs. I gave up on everything that should have given my life a purpose. This was the starting point of my downfall. I didn’t even know I had a mental illness. I tried to die by suicide and that’s when the first psychiatrist saw me and diagnosed me with depression.

But it wasn’t until later when I found out about my bipolar disorder. And life became as harder as it became easier. Easier because now I knew what has happened to me. Harder because it didn’t make me find my purpose in life.

I remember the time when I said and I actually believed I couldn’t write. I had zero confidence in myself. Today writing is all I do. I never thought I would actually find a reason to keep living. I wanted to die every moment of every single day. And now I’m still here. There must be a reason why.

I honestly don’t know why or how I wrote my first story. When I first wrote a story on Facebook, I didn’t think I would get any positive feedback from people. I was rather afraid, tense and anxious. But then I started getting messages from people I didn’t even know, asking me how to find a doctor and asking me how to get to know their own illness. I was surprised and shocked by the response.

Now I know this was the point where I found my purpose. I knew I wanted to help people struggling in silence like I did for so many years. I knew I wanted an opportunity to give back the help I got myself. I started writing about my own experiences. But it wasn’t enough.

I saw everywhere the stigma attached to mental illness. I saw people like us are not accepted as we should be. I saw people afraid to come out and say what they’re going through. I saw people in suits and dresses sitting in my psychiatrist’s office but I didn’t know where they were going after that. There must be a reason for all this secrecy and there must be a way to deal with it.

This was my life’s purpose. I knew in my heart I needed to put my foot down and do something to eradicate the stigma attached to mental illness in our society. I started Hope is Good India because of this. I want to make a difference by giving back what I have received.

This secrecy about mental illness is why we’re losing the bigger battle to these illnesses. It’s the reason why nobody comes out to talk about it. Well, it’s time to change this view. It’s time for a brand new beginning.

If you or someone you know needs help, visit our suicide prevention resources page.

If you need support right now, call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or text “START” to 741-741.

Thinkstock photo via MangoStar_Studio.

Originally published: February 22, 2017
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