Borderline Personality Disorder Makes Me Feel the Crushing Pain of Loneliness

As someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD), I find that loneliness is one of the symptoms I have the most trouble dealing with.

I often worry that I’m too reliant on others. Therefore I strive to be independent. This need for independence only lasts until I’m home alone.

As soon as my family leaves the house, I feel the crushing pain of loneliness. I’m empty. Nothing matters. I need someone. Anyone. When they return, I feel whole again. It’s like I’m incomplete without others to fill the gaps inside me.

But, I’m working on it. As long as I keep moving forward and trying, I’m happy.

I also find that online communities, like the Mighty, make me feel less alone in my experiences. Having that connection gives me hope that I can overcome my symptoms. Even if the progress is slow.