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When Chronic Illness Leaves You Stuck at Home Without a Job or Degree

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Though I tried with all my strength over and over again, I was not able to graduate college due to my chronic illness. I sit at home (living with my mother) and fill my days with useless hobbies, nonsense. I want to do more, I know I can do more if I was given the chance. I do not have the strength to work a normal job, I know this. I have tried to look into and apply for “work from home” jobs, but most of these require a college degree, or years of experience I do not have.

 

Due to my chronic illness, I feel trapped living a useless life – trapped inside these same walls I have lived in all my life. What makes me really upset is I know I have talents and abilities these positions are looking for, what I lack is that stupid piece of paper and the years of experience. How am I supposed to get experience if I need experience to gain experience? It is a ridiculous cycle. I would even love to go back to school online, but alas, that requires money, for which I need a job, which defeats the entire purpose.

I have a strong work ethic, I am willing to do whatever I physically am able to do, but I sit here and feel like that doesn’t matter. I will never be able to crawl my way out of where I am. I feel stuck in a deep ditch without a ladder to climb. This is one of the toughest issues I face due to my chronic illness. I am stuck watching everyone else move on with their lives while I remain forever stagnant.

I know I have talents and abilities that are going to waste. I am just living my life, killing time until I die. That is what it truly feels like. I won’t give up, I will still search for something I can do that doesn’t require that stupid college degree that was just a bit out of reach. Until then, I am stuck filling my depressing days with the purposeless hobbies that don’t contribute a bit to anything greater. I do not even know if my chronic illness would allow me to work any type of job as it certainly didn’t allow me to finish college, but I wish every single day that I would be given a chance.

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Thinkstock photo via sergio_kumer.

Originally published: July 20, 2017
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