When I Forced Myself to Make a List of the Positive Aspects of Chronic Illness

Too often when we think about life with chronic illness, we concentrate on the negatives. We don’t want to think about the “positives” chronic illness can bring because we’re too focused on the negative ways it has affected our lives.

We think about things such as: what we’ve missed out on, how different our lives are from those around us, the things we can’t/struggle to do, what we’ve lost to our illness/es, the horrible physical symptoms we feel, the isolation we feel and the mental health problems we may have to deal with as a consequence of our illness/es. For too long, I lived life believing chronic illness only presented me with adversity. I never allowed myself to entertain the possibility anything positive could exist in relation to such a seemingly negative thing.

One day while sitting in the hospital feeling sorry for myself, I decided to put together a list of positives. It felt strange at first because for too long I’d conditioned myself to believe only negative aspects of illness existed.

Since making this list I have found that my outlook on my chronic illnesses, as well as my outlook on my life in general, has changed. It didn’t happen quickly, it took a bit of time, but I kept re-looking at the list and reminding myself that it’s not all negative.

Here’s the list of “positives” I put together:

1. You quickly learn to cherish the small things in life: With chronic illness, sometimes the smallest things in life bring you joy. Focusing on what you can do instead of what you can’t do can really help you achieve this. For example, saying, “I can’t run, but I can walk,” or, “I can’t eat peanuts, but can still make some tasty allergy-friendly treats,” can really give you a positive outlook on dealing with chronic illnesses. You start to find you enjoy the smaller things in life such as going out when you can and doing things for yourself when you can.

2. It helps you learn who’s really there for you: Living with chronic health problems can be really isolating. With some people, I’ve found when they first find out you’re unwell or, for example, in the hospital, their general reaction tends to be along the lines of, “Are you OK? Is there anything I can do?” As time progresses, though, people stop asking. Many people stop trying to make plans with you if you’ve had to cancel multiple times as a result of your health problems. Although this is a horrible thing to endure and makes you feel even more isolated, it does have its positives — you find which people will be there for you even when things are tough.

3. You’re sometimes more motivated and determined to achieve your goals: When living with chronic illnesses, often all you want is a sense of normality in life, to do things that other people without chronic health problems take for granted. I’ve found that having chronic health problems has really helped me to be a great deal more motivated and determined to achieve the things I want to in life. I find that I’m also motivated and determined to prove people wrong, showing those who say, “You can’t do that,” that I can and I will.

4. Your achievements seem bigger, no matter how “small” they may be. Most people spend their time celebrating the big things in life: graduation, getting a job, getting married, starting a family, etc. However, when living with chronic illnesses, you find yourself celebrating the smaller things in life. Things such as taking a shower, cleaning, doing self-care and getting out of the house can be massive wins. Instead of focusing on what “big” celebrations you’re missing out on, try to celebrate your smaller achievements. I find making a list of goals with small, manageable steps can be of great help. Ticking them off as you achieve them can give you a real sense of accomplishment you may not otherwise feel.

5. You try to live each day to the fullest: You begin to value the things you can do in life when you face periods of time where you can’t do those things. I find myself focused on living my life to the fullest potential and trying to make the most of the good days. I’ve learned coping strategies to manage the day-to-day even when I have symptoms.

6. You come across some amazing people: In the chronic illness community, you meet so many different, amazing people. You understand each other’s struggles. Sometimes the best people in your life are the ones you’ve met as a result of fighting health battles.

7. You find yourself taking each day as it comes: When you live with a chronic illness, you start to learn to take things minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day. You understand more than most people that while things are difficult now, they won’t be this way forever.

8. You tend to be a more understanding person: Living with a chronic illness gives you a better sense of empathy for other people’s problems. You also tend to be more understanding towards people’s actions and behaviors. For example, if someone doesn’t message you back, you may be more inclined to believe they might have personal things going on instead of automatically assuming they’re ignoring you. This can actually really benefit your relationships.

9. You are a true warrior. You really are a warrior — not just because of the battles you face, but because you are an amazing person. Chronic illness is not who you are, it is part of what has shaped you/continues to shape you as a person. You have so many more qualities and are an amazing person in spite of your chronic illness/es.

What would you add? Let us know in the comments below.