The Anxiety of Leaving My House as a Person With Chronic Illness

“I don’t trust my body when I go out.”

“I plan the best I can, I get taxis instead of buses and I request assistance where I can but it’s still a massive ask, and I don’t know how it’ll go.”

“I don’t trust that I won’t faint in the middle of nowhere.”

“I don’t trust that I won’t get brain fog or end up lost.”

“I don’t trust that my joints will hold out and I’ll be able to walk.”

“I don’t trust that I won’t get really dizzy and sick and be unable to leave a random bathroom.”

“I don’t trust that my body won’t just give out on me.”

“Every time I leave my house I take supplies, snacks, extra medication or anything else I need.”

“A short trip is OK, like going for coffee.”

“A whole day out is horrible.”

“I’m physically and emotionally exhausted.”

“My mind is constantly fighting against itself.”

“Desperately clinging on to things that make me feel safe.”

“My mind is constantly racing, too long in case it drags me down.”

“It’s exhausting, but I won’t let it stop me.”