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Dear Dave Grohl, Thank You For Saving My Life

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Dear Dave Grohl,

I’ve written many thank you letters in my life, but never have I received a gift as precious as the one you don’t even know you gave my family.

One year ago, my daughter told her counselor she wanted to end her life. Her plan was to stand in front of the 3 p.m. train that passes just south of our neighborhood. The pain of depression had become too much for her. She picked this time because no one would be home to stop her. She had been experiencing panic attacks, insomnia and anxiety for four months, but still this came as a complete shock to us. Could this be my daughter who mere months ago was giggling and silly? Whose life was this? I’m eternally grateful she decided to tell someone.

The reality of this still hits hard a year later. Maybe that pain will always be there. But thankfully things are better now. Medication, counseling, understanding and patience in abundance have been truly life saving for her. She can see through that dark heavy “wave” as she calls it. She knows there is a happy life waiting for her and that the wave always fades away.

So why do I share this with you, Dave?  Because I want to thank you for saving my life.

I have a husband, daughter, son, family, friends, pets and a job. Responsibilities. My daughter was in trouble and I had to get myself together. Thoughts of giving up crossed my mind, but it wasn’t my desire.

Then, something extraordinary happened. My husband and I started watching “Sonic Highways,” the TV series you directed and hosted. Your genuine, joyful, “let’s grab everything in life and love it” persona intrigued me. Watching this show inevitably led me to your music.

Specifically “These Days.”

It made me cry. Not just a few glistening tears. No, I completely lost it. You were singing about our life. Family and good friends who were trying to help would say “It’s alright, she’s a teen. It’ll pass. She just needs to snap out of it.”  I love these people, but they didn’t understand. Your song let me feel that. So I played it daily. The line, “Easy for you to say” got me out of bed. It motivated me to shower, work and live.

Whenever I felt the tears and pain, which for months was daily, or when the overwhelming weight of our situation would bear down on me, I’d listen to your song to gain control. I felt anger instead of sadness. The anger gave me the power to push through.

A few things struck me through this whole experience — that maybe parts of our lives happen for a reason, that depression affects more than the person who experiences it and how we must find the strength to live our lives. The way you live your life tells me you understand, survive and thrive.

So thank you for your unbelievable gift. I can honestly say I was changed, touched and saved by your creativity. The members of my family are now lifetime Foo Fighters fans, and we plan to keep all four of our lives healthy, grabbing every experience we can and loving everything out of it.

Rock on, Dave — you’re my life coach and my “ordinary” hero.

If you or someone you know needs help, see our suicide prevention resources.

If you need support right now, call the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

The Mighty is for the following: Write a thank you note to someone who helped you through your mental illness. What about that person makes him or her a good ally? What do you want them to know? If you’d like to participate, please send a blog post to mentalhealth@themighty.com. Please include a photo for the piece, a photo of yourself and 1-2 sentence bio. Check out our Share Your Story page for more about our submission guidelines.

Originally published: November 19, 2015
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