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Fibromyalgia Makes Me Feel Like I've Been Beaten Up by Invisible Elves

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Fibromyalgia pain for me feels like I’ve been beaten up by invisible elves. I’ve described it like this before in another article and I’ll reiterate it again. I describe it like this because, though amusing, I hope it gives people a phrase to communicate the random, irritating and agonizing nature of the pain.

I was first made painfully aware of my condition when I once woke up crying in the middle of the night because it felt like someone had beaten me up. I was disorientated and touched my arms and legs tentatively. I felt bruised but couldn’t see any bruises. I looked around my dorm room trying to find a culprit, but my room was empty with no sign of a break in. I was stumped. The abruptness of the pain and the heaviness of my limbs caught me by surprise. I racked my brain trying to remember if I had carried anything heavy the day before or had run a marathon and not remembered. Nope, this was just the first symptoms of my fibromyalgia.

I often describe the intensity of the pain as constantly being pricked with needles, while simultaneously being hit by a hammer in the depths of my body.

There are times when I suddenly cry out in surprise because it honestly feels like someone has stabbed me with a knife from the inside of my back. I catch myself before I turn around to verbally attack the offender, because – you guessed it! – it’s my body that’s the offender.

And there are times when the sharpness and prolonged nature of the pain leave me panting. I’ve had my brother jokingly question whether I was in labor. My face concentrated and I’m trying to hold in my cries, but often I can’t. The pain literally screams itself from my body with me reeling from the strength of it.

Fibromyalgia pain manifests itself differently for each person. And unfortunately with the constant debate over the actual scientific nature of fibromyalgia, often people describe symptoms on support forums, desperately questioning whether each manifestation of pain is part of the condition or something else…

For now I’ll keep using the beaten up by invisible elves story.

Getty Image by AndreyPopov

Originally published: March 8, 2018
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