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The Unique Isolation of Grieving During a Pandemic

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This story is dedicated to Clay Wymer, who passed away on August 10, 2020.

Grief — the silent monster no one can prepare themselves or their mind for. One day it honestly hits you in the face like a ton of bricks, and whatever situation that brought the grief does too.

In a world where COVID-19 seems like the only thing happening and the rest of life has been put on pause for now, life is still continuing and it continues on with many people missing from everyday life. I know how weird that sounds — life is on pause, but it still continues, doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. Grief is strange like that though, it’s like I find myself stuck in that moment I was in the hospital with my dad as he passed away, even though it has been almost six months now that he has been gone. My life has continued yes, but not entirely.

All over this world people are going through the motions that are associated with
grief for a lot of different reasons. The pandemic has thrown everything off course for so many people. So many people have lost parents, grandparents, wives, husbands, children, siblings, friends, etc. People have also lost jobs that they have had for years and that they love. There are so many reasons people are experiencing grief right now and many people are grieving multiple things at once. Some days it is just flat out painful — a type of pain that no one is ever prepared to experience.

For those who are dealing with the loss of someone they love, I am so sorry this
has happened, whether it was COVID-19 or something else. No matter what it was nothing makes it any easier. Some days are better than others, I’ve learned, but the days that aren’t so great always seem to find a way to eclipse the good ones. But I have also learned that holding onto the memories you have made throughout the years is helpful, whether that is the multitude of pictures throughout all phases of life, or funny videos and voicemails. No, these things will not bring back that person you want so badly, but it will help soften what feels like the barrier you have put up to protect your heart and mind from anymore pain.

The truth is grief is so different for everyone. There isn’t one path you will go down, grief is filled with many twists and turns, ups and downs and everything else in between. I feel that grief is very isolating. No matter the situation, you feel alone, even though you may have more people than you can count reaching out. It doesn’t matter because the one person you want to talk about it with isn’t there to get you through it. Grief is isolating no matter the time, but when you are dealing with the isolation that comes with being in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic, sometimes that isolation is just flat out a lot to bare all at once.

Nothing could have prepared me for what I am presently dealing with after losing my dad. He was and still is my best friend and always will be. Nothing will change that, and I think that makes dealing with this grief all that more painful. Grief is hard, tiring and painful and a plethora of other feeling and emotions, and we all have to find what works for us. No one’s grief is the same now nor will it ever be.

Originally published: February 9, 2021
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