How is it that the person I fear the most is myself. I'm currently on the sixth hour waiting in the ER waiting to get sent to a behavioral facility. I am not going because I'm afraid I am going to commit suicide. I am going because I am afraid of what I will do to myself during this ongoing three day binge of self harm, self loathing, and anger. For once I am not feeling this way because of something I've done. I don't know what hurts worse, being hurt purposely, or hurting myself. At least I know for the next three days I should be safe.