Dec 13th will be 10 years and he recently told me Ive made him feel suicidal and he wants to take a break. I feel so numb. He keeps asking me not to hate him, I dont hate him, Im not even mad at him. I hate myself. Ive been such a terrible person and I thought my attitude and emotions didnt bother him, but it did. I was so blind and now Im alone. Im trying so hard not to cut. I got drunk last night, didnt help any today, but felt good last night. #feelalone #husbandleft #icausedthis