husbandleft

What do if my husband leaves me for 2 months and counting? I know when he leaves me, it’s my fault because of past issue that hasn’t been resolved yet, plus my constant lying and money issues.
No third party involved. Now, He just always viewed my Facebook stories but never replying to any of my messages. So I already stop messaging him.l because I’m always seenzoned. Went to his office back in November-December 2018 but He said he doesn’t want to talk. He’s angry and I think he’s fallen out of love already. I think I did my part and asked for his forgiveness. His staying to his family.

Dec 13th will be 10 years and he recently told me Ive made him feel suicidal and he wants to take a break. I feel so numb. He keeps asking me not to hate him, I dont hate him, Im not even mad at him. I hate myself. Ive been such a terrible person and I thought my attitude and emotions didnt bother him, but it did. I was so blind and now Im alone. Im trying so hard not to cut. I got drunk last night, didnt help any today, but felt good last night. #feelalone #husbandleft #icausedthis