inoperable

I am in therapy and for me,at this moment,all I can and want to handle.I know facts from delussion now,to a point.I was part of a study,unbeknownst to me,for apoximately over a year.it has been closed,my, case.my prospects or prognosis so to say,I am deconstructing as we speak,daily.I feel it and to be told,Im looking for attention or couldn't feel it is insulting.
I've had sever cognitive decline,noticeable to excollegues but not my closest.I do not have a circle to surround myself with.Id love to beable to collaborate with others,like me.I have a Cerebellum AVM,grade 6,inoperable due to size,a lime and location,lies deep in.After a life of trying to keep up,my heart has taken the toll,as muscles too.my heart, has a congenital defect and irreversible damage.I was not an athlete,but I was active,extremely.I lived to go to a club and dance, to move.it was euphoric,any music that brings out movement.My veins are small,collapsing and bleeding from micro tares under the pressure.There is no where for the pressure to go now.Whats next,who knows.Being Mindful is truly,my only treatment.Sucks when you have to try to fix a broke brain.Scarey and unsure I want to revisit this again.im getting less and less sleep.im hurting like before and am depressed.I see it.There is too much to be done and well,not enough time that I always thought I had.

I’m wondering if anyone has encountered this before - my condition directly affects my kink and it’s pretinent I clarify some aspects with my doctor/oncologist. Does anyone have suggestions on how to approach the subject without appearing brash and getting a “raised eyebrow”? I’m hoping to get some unbiased answers from a professional.
Thank you in advance.
#kink #disclosure #illaskwhatyouwont #UCD #inoperable #subcarina #ropebondage