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What ‘This Is Us’ Got Right About Miscarriage

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There’s never an easy way to tackle a tough subject such as miscarriage, but the show “This is Us” handled it pretty well in my opinion. If you watch the show, you know that a few episodes back, we learned that Kate found out she was pregnant. I saw the episode a few days after losing my baby to a miscarriage when I was 5 weeks along. The roller coaster of emotions that take place after having a miscarriage can make hearing about pregnancy, whether in real life or just on a TV show, really difficult.

When Kate found out she was pregnant, she was determined not to get excited about it because she feared the worst from the beginning. Being in her late 30s and overweight, she was considered to have a high-risk pregnancy. As time went on, she began to feel excited and did everything she could to keep her growing baby healthy. Although my situation was different, I can definitely understand how Kate was feeling when she first found out she was pregnant.For more than 10 years, I’ve battled a chronic disease called endometriosis that affects my reproductive organs, and getting pregnant (after four years of trying naturally) was nothing short of a miracle. I honestly couldn’t even believe it was finally happening! I’ve never felt that level of joy before, and I wasn’t ready for it to end.

Even through the joy I was feeling, there was still a cloud of fear hanging over me due to my chronic illness. Just like Kate, I wanted to do everything I could to keep my baby safe and healthy despite the odds I was facing.

A couple of episodes after Kate finds out she’s pregnant, you see how happy she is as she prepares for the baby to arrive in the coming months. As she’s going into the bathroom to measure the bathtub for a baby bath she bought, she collapses in pain, taking the shower curtain rod down with her. She’s taken to the ER where a doctor informs her she lost the baby. As difficult as it was for me to watch this episode, I also finally understand the importance of bringing awareness to the heartbreak that so many women like myself have experienced. Sadly, approximately 1 in 4 pregnancies end in miscarriage. That means you probably know a woman who has experienced this tragedy.

Not only am I thankful that my favorite show covered such a sensitive topic, but I’m proud of the way they used the entire episode to paint a picture of what it’s really like. As Kate comes back home from the hospital, she walks by the bathroom where the broken shower curtain rod was and immediately begins to have flashbacks to the day before when she collapsed. This resonated with me because I’ve experienced similar emotions triggered by seeing a certain room or item that is familiar to me from the day I lost my baby.

Some may not understand why it’s so difficult, especially when the baby is lost early on. Miscarriage crushed the dreams I had for my baby and my hopes for starting a family with my husband. I wanted to make him a dad more than anything. I was definitely having a lot of the same emotions Kate was having, and though it was difficult to watch, it was a good reminder that I’m not the only one grieving.

Even though the show isn’t real life, they sure got it right. The emotions, the anger, the guilt, and the willingness of loved ones to show up at your door to take care of you. If you’ve experienced a miscarriage, don’t feel like you have to face it alone. Reach out to your family, friends, and the women around you. You may be surprised at the encouragement you will receive and the amount of times you will hear “I’ve been there, too.”

Follow this journey on Pretty Gutsy.

Photo via Facebook – This Is Us

Originally published: December 12, 2017
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