How do I explain? #FeelingLow #whatdoyoudo
How do I explain that my body often fails me and I’m embarrassed by it? How do I explain that one second I’m fine and the next my world has flipped upside down and I can’t quite stand up straight? How do I explain that I didn’t want to cut all of those things from my diet or lose 40 pounds? How do I explain that I would love to eat three times a day but two meals is already pushing it most days? How do I explain that I don’t want to leave early but if I don’t leave now I might get stuck here? How do I explain that I know my symptoms are inconvenient for you? How do I explain that sometimes all I feel is pain and other times I can’t feel anything at all? How do I explain that I am always in fear that I might pass out or lose control of my legs in the middle of a crowd or at work? How do I explain that I am constantly exhausted and sometimes it’s all I can do to keep my eyes open? How do I explain that I may look drunk to you but I actually haven’t had alcohol in two years because I know my body will reject it for days? How do I explain that I want to be an independent 24 year old but I am so thankful for that extra set of hands on the days that I can’t lift my arms? How do I explain the shame I feel when someone has to help me shower? How do I explain how much love I have for the man that has stood beside me and held my hand through this journey? How do I explain the amount of guilt I also have for putting him through it? How do I explain that there is so much more going on than what you see or what I can tell you? How do I explain that I’ve seen 17 doctors in a year and half and still have no answers on how to fix this? How do I explain that I’m so sick of being sick? How do I explain that I don’t want your pity but would appreciate some understanding or support? How do I explain that I’m tired of explaining? #LivingWithPOTS #ButYouDontLookSick #ReadyForMoreAnswers #FamilyDoesntGetIt