I can barely remember the day it started or maybe I have evolved into some kind of numb punching bag. After 15 years of chronic pain and immobility I am forced to take pain pills ever day. If you can ride this journey without it changing the chemical make up of your brain my hat is off to you. The stigma of taking antidepressants and being on pain pills is something you never shake when we live in a society of ableism any deformities are considered a handicap.

This is why I feel like a fraud my mental and physical wellness are being propped up by medications the real me is probably lost and always will be. However if I don't take the antidepressants my agoraphobia and depression comes back like a freight train. If I don't take the pain medication I can't walk even with braces and my blood pressure (more pills) will go through the roof. I'm stuck on this ride until my last breath because there is no cure for my rare muscle disease each day counts as being upright and not bed ridden my worst fear.#MentalHealth #MDD #OCD #MuscularDystrophy #PeripheralNeuropathy #Disability #alodynia #Hyperalgesia #DegenerativeDiscDisease