Agoraphobia

Another denial on the books..I just don’t know how long I can keep this up. My therapist that I was absolutely so happy with quit as well..it’s just left me feeling so numb. It’s all too much to take in and I feel like im spiraling. #PTSD #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Agoraphobia #PanicAttacks #Anxiety #Depression

Hi-
I tried posting last night
I am still having a hard time understanding what happened but I am not doing well. I don’t feel real. There has been so much that has happened the last couple of years that people truly don’t believe me when I try to get help. I have had to refer them to my therapist to give them the “she isn’t making this up” affirmation in order to establish the belief in my story.
She can’t be my therapist anymore. She switched jobs recently and she doesn’t take the insurance I just switched to so I could finally get my migraine medication covered after over a year of not having it
It’s been years. No one has believed me.
Now people see all of the problems and obstacles and deny me help and blame it on me. I just started feeling safe advocating for myself again but I keep experiencing more trauma.
It hasn’t stopped
It sounds like an exaggeration. It’s not.
I don’t want to be told I will find someone else who believes me. I know that is the case. But what am I going to have to go through to get that person? My rights have already been very boldly disregarded by another agency and I am currently trying to get help/awareness for that. I already have tried to ask for help/access services for seven years. It has caused me unbelievable trauma to just try to access help. I haven’t been able to make progress because I have spent years trying to get people to just let me talk without interrupting me to redefine my reality. Or to tell me how to solve a problem they haven’t fully heard.
I have never felt so incredibly alone. I have never truly been this alone
It doesn’t feel like it can be real
#WritingThroughIt #CheckInWithMe #ADHD #ChronicMigraines #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #CPTSD #Agoraphobia #PanicAttacks #Anxiety

I am really scared. I don’t know how to describe everything that has happened in the last few years but it has been truly unreal. I’ve only had my therapist for stretches of time. She has been the only one who has helped me get through.
I’m not doing this justice. Just, something… happened and idk if I’ll be able to see her anymore but I thought I will
I need help but I can’t get this out right. I’m really scared
#ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Agoraphobia #PanicAttacks

Just ranting about what just happened so feel free to ignore me.

Yesterday we had a family only birthday party for my 12yrs cousin which of course drained my social battery which haven't properly recovered today, not including that I didn't stop since I woke up having to eat breakfast, do an 1 hour walk then go straight to cleaning as chores.
I woke up at 7am and could only pause now at 10am, yet when I asked my grandmother "do you need my help with my brother or can I go shower and rest ?" She went all "you don't need to rest ! Rest from what ?"

I know for her what I did wasn't much but for me it is, I have agoraphobia and social anxiety so staying on groups on itself is draining to me even being family. Currently I am on group therapy and other treatments so I can handle those better but I still can't even speak at the group therapy yet, only a few words at best.

I have been in several treatments for years by now, I made a HUGE progress through all that time which I'm proud of doing. Although there is still much that I cannot do, and some that even when I can do, I need a lot of rest afterwards.

#Ranting #Vent

Hi, my name is mrswatts16. I want to to feel less isolated and recover from my illnesses

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #PTSD #Agoraphobia

In the midnight hour
She sat under the moons glow
Watching waves crash upon the shore
There she could let her tears show
She looked to the stars
And wondered if God could hear
The prayers that she whispered
To protect what she holds dear
She closed her eyes
Opened her heart to soothe her soul
Letting go of the things
Of which she has no control
The world was still for a moment
Allowing peace to take her mind
Upon opening her eyes
She had left her fears behind
In the midnight hour
She sat under the moons glow
A piece of heaven
To which she could always go

#BipolarDisorder #Bipolar1Disorder #BipolarDepression #PTSD #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #AnxietyAttack #Agoraphobia

I think I accidentally hacked #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder
This is about to make my dissociation so much less distressing
#CPTSD #ChronicMigraines #Agoraphobia #PanicAttacks #DomesticAbuseSurvivors