For the first time at least that I have noticed I became physically ill against my will mostly due to stress. I can only assume because I don’t know if this is a BPD thing or ADHD thing (my therapist recently suggested I could be on the spectrum but I think it’s ADHD)

I was at work and began to tingle all over.

I became sick to my stomach queasy and nauseous and lightheaded. I had to double over and lean on a table while sitting. I called my supervisor and as soon as she came in and asked something (I can’t remember, it was yesterday) I immediately began to cry with no warning or control so she suggested do you need to use the bathroom and I did and just pretended to throw up because I was too embarrassed to say no I’m just crying uncontrollably. Then I went home on claims of being sick which I did feel but after I cried I felt a bit better…still not well my stomach was bothered but like it was much less intense once I left work. I don’t know if that means I need to leave my job which I’ve been considering this week. My decision making skills feel broken like out of order and not capable of being used effectively. I have never been aware of my physical body being affected so directly by stress but I don’t know why else that would happen. I feel so lost and confused and weird and defective.