Don’t even know where to start. Cause just thinking about it makes me mad and emotional. I am currently 28. I have a boyfriend. I technically don’t have a job, but he kinda has one that is fair (he is into developing) He has been trough a few well paid jobs in the past 2 years. He has money and he know how to work with his money especially when he has a cred card. We live with his parents. I had to ask my mother to help pay rent while i live here. And It makes me feel so bad. I don’t want a job where it’s 9-5 everyday working for someone. Sure I’ll get paid pretty well then I currently am. I am a self proclaimed artist. Doing customised art for people. (Graphite pencil drawings) it takes like maybe 2 weeks for a drawing to be done. And It clearly isn’t enough in my parents eyes an especially not my bofriends’. He keeps pushing me to get a “real” job. My parents too. They don’t understand that I don’t have that mentality or strength to have a work everyday. For the rest of my life. I have no idea how people stay sane. I couldn’t even fathom how I would deal with it. I know for sure i will in the future off myself. Look, I want to make money. Enough to pay my rent and still be reliable for my self. But it’s hard when yout drawings don’t sell and people aren’t interested. I work my ass off just to finsih one drawing and I don’t get that much for it. I don’t know what to do. My bf told me he will have to end things between us if it keeps going on like this. (We are 4 years together this year) #Depression #Anxiety #moneyproblems #financialproblems #failedartist #failedperson #failedson #Idontbelonghere #WhyAmIHere