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#Trauma : IT'S A FAMILY AFFAIR
I’m gonna review on a story from a book entitled The Gift of Fear by Becker which emphasized on survival signals.
Dylann Roof, brother of Amber Roof had been accused of slaying nine black churchgoers in a racial hate crime in South Carolina after Amber, recognized her brother’s distinctive bowl haircut on TV and called the cops to tip them off. Police apprehended her brother in Shelby, North Carolina - just 3 miles from where Amber’s fiance was living with his children.
Beyond the shock of her brother’s hate crimes and the grief for the victims who lost their lives, Amber was faced with a choice that no wedding planner has ever considered: What do you do when your brother shoots up a church just days before you walk down the aisle on the happiest day of your life?
Of course, Amber and her fiance called off the wedding and went into hiding. They were married weeks later in a secluded cabin, unable to salvage their original plans in their original venue. Amber and her fiance have yet to surface. Solace and normalcy were stolen from her, her husband, and her stepfamily.
Months passed, Amber stated in her Facebook that “The real victims are the ones who lost their lives that day. I should not speak, as it may come off as if I am comparing my pain and loss to theirs”
Well, the nine people who were killed by her brother were indeed victims. But her pain was profound, and she was a victim too. Her pain and their pain aren’t on a scale to be judged, as we can’t view our pain through a hierarchical lens.
Denying your personal pain won’t lessen other people’s suffering. Denying your personal pain will only increase it.
Denial is… a save-now-pay-later scheme, a contract writen entirely in small print, for in the long run, the denying person knows the truth on some level, and it causes a constant low-grade anxiety. Millions of people suffer that anxiety, and denial keeps them from taking action that could reduce the risks (and the worry) (de Becker, 2015).
#PTSD #positive #MentalHealth #attitude #AnxietyBooks #libraries #SpreadTheWordToEndTheWord #Love #selfhealing #psychology #Beauty #Education
