Changing Meds Again
I am running out of options. I am scraping the bottom of the barrel of medications to treat my bipolar II. The last one for me to try and that my doctor just put me on is Lithium. I am scared what will happen if this one doesn’t work. My depression can be so severe at times that I become suicidal. I really just don’t know what to do. I am scared to put all my faith in this one only to have it not work either. I was on Vraylar and it worked great for so long and then I developed akathesia just like I did on saphris and those were my two best medications. I just don’t understand why they turned on me the way they did. The akathesia was so bad that I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.
My doctor decided to take me off my ADHD meds during the holiday to see if that was what the problem was and not actually Akathesia, but that just made the actual problem pop even more. Now I am getting ready to go on another vacation to visit family while trying out a new medication. It just seems like the worlds worst timing for all of this to be going on right now. I wanted to be able to show my sister the new me that is stable and clear headed and instead she gets to see me when I am in a questionable state of mind. I really didn’t want her to see me likethat. I really just want to find a medication that works and keeps me clear headed and stable with out being numb and unreactive to things. I just want to be the best person I can be. Here is to hoping that this is a better year and that the medication works and that I can be stronger this year and be a better person. I want to be able to get out there and live life and smile and laugh instead of just “being”. #ADHD #Bipolar #Vraylar #litium #medicationchanges