Dear diary:

We need to stop telling women to be beautiful and good to attract a men; that message has been heard, and has done more harm to women than good. We are telling little girls that boys can’t help but be ignorant to their feelings. We tell them they get teased and bullied because they are liked… we tell them it’s ‘just how boys act’. We make excuse after excuse for bad and inappropriate disrespectful behavior, but an angry women who stands up for herself against this is dismissed as ‘dramatic’ ‘over emotional’ and ‘sensitive’.

How about we start teaching our young men respect. To be good to women, to show and handle their feelings and emotions in a healthy and mature way without defensiveness or violence towards objects or others.
Teach them accountability for their own behaviors and to accept consequences.
Show them how their behavior affects other peoples emotions and make them aware of their part in that, and how ignoring that effects us all negatively.
It’s not men’s war against women, it’s men’s war against feeling; because they’ve been taught for generations that feeling feelings and showing emotions is a sign of weakness.
That women are weak emotional creatures for speaking their hearts, wants and needs.

We need to create an environment where it’s safe for men to express themselves in a healthy way; because repressed emotions lead to aggressive and disturbed behaviors, mental illness, abuse, and violence.
It’s ok to not feel ok. It is not ok to treat someone badly because you can’t handle not feeling ok.

We expect and tell men to take responsibility, yet we teach them to repress their feelings leaving them with a ticking timebomb, hot, and ready to explode when triggered. And not just men. Any child growing up in an emotionally unstable and unhealthy environment had a major challenge to overcome to become emotionally healthy.

We need to teach people it’s ok to feel.
To express themselves healthy and to take responsibility over ourselves towards others. We can all blame our parents, our girlfriends, our boyfriends, our husbands and wifes, or even our boss. We can all be victims of something. But that won’t change anything. You don’t need to become an asshole because of it. Trauma doesn’t need to create more trauma. Be your own example, take responsibility; seek counseling.

Change the narrative. Ask yourself…
What’s the worse that could happen if you choose to live authentically.
Make yourself proud.