seid

I just turned 17 when diagnosed after seeing 26 doctors in a year and a half. I suffered from a severe case of Mono the year I was 15. I missed over a 100 days of school my sophomore year. I eventually chose to leave school and pursue my GED. It wasn't until I was 20 that I went into my 1st remission. By age 24 I was sick again only this time I was on my own and not under the shelter of Living in my parents home. I have had the same doctor since then and God help me if she ever retires.

I gave birth to my 1st son at age 32. Oddly enough being pregnant was the best I've felt in my entire sick life. The aftermath of my pregnancy reeked havoc on my body and while I enjoy everyday of him now I know that I could not go through with having a 2nd baby. I guess for me the struggle is so much of what I have had to give up what all of us give up to live with this disease. I try to focus on small victories and early morning reflection of gratitude from the day before. Depression runs in my family and while I've never suffered from diagnosed depression there is an underlying sadness that comes with living with chronic fatigue.

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia when I was 34 I was working full time and decided to start a home based business. You may think I'm crazy, but in my mind the home based business to was a safety net because I knew that there would come a time where I would not be able to leave the house and work a regular 9 to 5 job.

Now fast forward and I am 40. Last year I was involved in an auto accident where I was rear ended by a semi truck while at a complete stop on an exit ramp. I was on leave of absence for 4 months. Physical therapy as I'm sure most of you know only aggravates our condition, so the healing has been slow. I went back to work for 6 months and was laid off due to a reduction in workforce. That same month my mother passed away. She also lived with chronic illness.

I am publicly saying for the 1st time that I am not OK. It has been almost 6 years this time since I have relapsed and this flare up is the scariest by far. I can normally meditate or self reflect to get myself to a point where I'm at least motivated. I am the most exhausted I've ever been. The grief of losing my career and my mother all in the same month was definitely a shock to my system.

Now I continue to run my home base business when I feel up to engaging people through social media or inviting them into my home to see my "shop". I am finding more and more that the bubbly extrovert who saw this is a temporary relapse is becoming engulfed in the fog and the fatigue. The meds alleviate some symptoms, bought cause a slough of others.

My doctor had experimentally prescribed me ritalin , time released, to help just get me moving and it does help with the focus but not the energy. I had wondered if anyone had tried Adderal with any success? I am not ready to throw in the towel. My son deserves more.
#ChronicFatigueSyndrome