“When the damage is done,

the war is over,

YET Nothing is ever over,

It’s all around you.

Are you lucky to be alive?

Or too broken to continue.”

These brave soldiers,

Who fought on the front lines?

Come with stories of anguish,

Facing death with their lives.

We call them our heroes,

As they fight for what's right.

They try to be triumphant,

They do their best to survive.

I spoke to a man,

Who fought on the front line.

He told me many stories,

He told me of his change in time.

Standing trapped in endless visions,

of the sounds when they attack.

While drowning in a bloodbath,

carrying comrades on his back.

With each breath,

a smell of sulfur lingers,

visions of blood and pain.

Collecting tags among the fallen,

they did not die in vain.

Burning towns and villages,

blood-stained grounds, oh! the slaughter.

Of innocent women and children,

fathers and mothers.

Struggling with all his might,

just to keep himself alive.

As he crawls through the bloodshed,

helps to keep him in disguise.

He thinks of only good thoughts

His friends, his wife, and family.

How does one keep sane?

when a thousand deaths cover thee?

Alone, not a sound, or spoken word,

Silence is all too clear.

He Searches for his comrades,

avoiding the hidden land mines in fear.

Robbed of sleep, he grows weaker,

he's in a fragile state

His survivals seeking vengeance,

his eyes now filled with hate.

These casualties of war,

are of his fallen brothers.

Collecting tags, pictures, and letters,

to give peace to family members.

He's in a lucid dream-like state,

racing thoughts keep him awake.

For all he knows has fallen dead,

so he tries hard to be brave.

Full of courage?

To be a hero?

Yet the war has brought him only baggage.

Home is with the fallen,

as he tries his best to make it.

As most of his comrades,

came back in a casket.

He is lucky to be alive.

But there's a different head

A disturbing mindset

That builds the rage inside,

Feeling he'd be better off dead,

his fears are of reality

To be rejected by his own.

For all he knows,

is lost to the fallen war.

Many thoughts pierce his mind

Like can he walk among the living?

And not be condemned for what he has done.

The greatest acts of all his sins?

He feels far too much,

so much stress and tension.

Could it be, this paranoia,

Thinking society will reject him?

Will he be remembered for the good?

Or will it be his sins of sorrow?

or a battle fought and won

making a better tomorrow?

Will these memories ever leave him?

The war still lives on inside his mind

With all this damage,

Can he leave it behind?

Can his life start over,

as his children, they grew.

So many missed moments,

precious memories are few.

He wants to be there,

yet he doesn't understand it.

His life has changed around him,

yet his wife is so committed.

He may appear to be alive,

But it's only on the outside.

As memories come on through,

He's haunted from the inside.

Nothing has changed,

He struggles his way through.

A life that's so different,

Then what he once knew.

He finds it hard to start his day,

so he lies awake in bed.

He thinks about his brothers,

they were his family; now they're dead.

He tries to put it behind him,

but the rage builds up inside.

Hiding tears and pain,

And all his pent-up anxiety.

Alone in his thoughts,

He's not qualified for anything else.

No one can understand,

except the ones...

six feet underground.

This struggle he can't forget,

It lives inside his head.

He keeps silent,

reliving memories of bloodshed.

Nothing's ever over,

it's all around you.

is he lucky to be alive,

Or too broken to continue.

Society welcomes him

With loving open arms,

but can they help him,

take away these scars?

Nothing is ever over,

it's all far from over.

His memories turn him,

Into a monster.

Still, the worst is yet to come,

It's against the ones who love you.

Then he understands,

Why his family left too.

It all starts with a sound,

sparking off into a trigger.

Of emotional, painful memories,

that can hurt the ones that matter.

Is it worth the loss of many?

He feels lost and left behind.

Swallowed by his personal torment,

can he ever get peace of mind?

Will his war ever be over,

as he relives those moments of death?

Picking up the pieces every day,

battles strike inside his head.

yet all their selfless acts

kept us all safe and free.

for causes so big

for you and for me.

So, stick up for one another,

too many suffered and lost their lives.

Fighting for our country's freedom

their ultimate sacrifice.

Joanna Crazontheinside

#soldierptsd #mentalhealthmatters #PTSD #happymemorialday #Broken