My mom is sick. She's currently in a rehab facility so they can help her get strong enough to walk again, etc. My mom and I don't have a good relationship, we never have. I was always closer to my dad but he passed about 3 years ago. When my mom got sick I kept telling her to go to the doctor. My siblings, KM and BD finally convinced my mom to go. They did an x-ray of her lungs and found she has pneumonia. They put her on another round of antibiotics. That week kept calling my mom to check up on her. On May 27th I called and she asked why I kept calling. I told her because I was worried and neeed to know if I should come over there. We live in different states. She said, "you better not come over here young lady!" That Sunday I get a call that the neighbor took mom to the hospital because she was having problems breathing. My sibling, KM wanted me to go over there. I told her I couldn't because I had hurt my shoulder and neck and couldn't drive more than 10 minutes. Plus KM is on my mom's power of attorney. KM was mad because she was in the middle of buying a new house. When KM was there she told me that my mom kept info regarding her x-ray from me. That they had found a mass. KM said mom's house looks like it hasn't been cleaned in years and smells like a barn. She stopped scooping her two cats litter boxes so there was cat feces everywhere. KM cleaned up what she could. KM started asking when I was coming over. I told her I didn't know because of my physical therapy. That I'm trying not to have shoulder surgery. She then got upset and got my other sibling BD to come up. My sister flew back to South to deal with her new house and packing. That is when she calls me to tell me that I need to go over to mom's because KM hasn't been at her job long enough to receive family medical leave plus I currently don't have a job. I told her again about my shoulder and she said, "I know that is a hardship for you but you need to go over there." I said well can't BD use his FML. They tried to tell me he doesn't receive it. So I looked it up and he's been in the military for about 20 years, he does receive FML. KM and my mom said that they didn't want him to use it because he's in the military, but they want me to drop my physical therapy and come over there so my sister can go back south. I explained that where mom lives everything is 30 minutes or more away and they don't have ubers. Plus, it's an 8 hour drive to get there. I'm just now able to pick up a plate with my right hand. I can't hold a one pound weight with my arm stretched out for more than 45 seconds. So they didn't care about my health, didn't ask Ben to use his family medical leave, my sister quit her job to go back to my mom's and now they are all mad at me. When my dad died I was the only child to go help my mom go through my dad's stuff. Financially I couldn't afford to be up there because I had been out of work for about 7 months. It took me two weeks to go through my dad's things because my mom sat in her room watching TV. I had to do it all by my self. No offers to help from my siblings but I didn't hold it against them nor did I make underhanded or abusive comments to them. It was really hard for me because my dad and I were so close. Now I'm either being ignored by them, not being updated about my mom, or they are make comments about me being self-centered. I haven't told them that my hair has been falling out, I have severe dry skin and the thought of eating makes me sick and this all started ever since I got a hysterectomy in April. I hardly sleep. I only eat one meal a day and sometimes I feel so dizzy. My emotions are all over the place so my doctor upped my anxiety and depression meds. But telling my family won't do anything because they wouldn't care just like my neck/shoulder. It's okay for KM to put her new house first and BD to put his career but I get treated like garbage because I for once put my health first. Am I the problem?

#familyissues #amiselfcentered #Depression #Anxiety #selfcare