Bipolar 1 Disorder

Today I sat on my kitchen floor and cried. Hired to make strawberry mango cupcakes for a 21st birthday, I decided to do a trial run. I worked really hard on the batter and frosting, making a strawberry purée, mango lime compote and a mango purée to incorporate into it. Spoiler alert, it didn’t work out. My mango and strawberry cream cheese frosting was sticky and didn’t stand up, my cupcakes flat with too much moisture. The only thing going for me was that my mango lime compote turned out perfect. I cried on the floor. I had made a bulk batch of both frosting flavors, intending to use them for the actual cupcakes. I had run out of mangos and strawberries as I had used all of them for the purée. I knew how to fix that batter but didn’t have the ingredients to do so. I was devastated. Out of all the cupcakes I’ve made in the past, I only had to redo the batter once. But the beauty of life, is that there can be second chances and when a second chance comes along, you don’t start from scratch but from experience. I ended up making a vanilla cupcake and infused it with my strawberry purée, adding in the mango lime compote in the middle. Next I trashed the frosting and made a new batch with just a plain cream cheese frosting. The second batch of cupcakes worked out perfectly, it paired well with the purée and compote and switching to a basic cream cheese frosting worked out in my benefit. Life throws curveballs and it’s easy to feel defeated. Things don’t always workout the first time around and that’s okay! It’s important to try and try again until we get it right. Sometimes second chances work out for the better. When we learn from our mistakes and press forward, we can accomplish anything. Keep going, keep learning, and never give up. #Bipolar1 #MentalHealth #Anxiety #MightyTogether

Today I sat on my kitchen floor and cried. Hired to make strawberry mango cupcakes for a 21st birthday, I decided to do a trial run. I worked really hard on the batter and frosting, making a strawberry purée, mango lime compote and a mango purée to incorporate into it. Spoiler alert, it didn’t work out. My mango and strawberry cream cheese frosting was sticky and didn’t stand up, my cupcakes flat with too much moisture. The only thing going for me was that my mango lime compote turned out perfect. I cried on the floor. I had made a bulk batch of both frosting flavors, intending to use them for the actual cupcakes. I had run out of mangos and strawberries as I had used all of them for the purée. I knew how to fix that batter but didn’t have the ingredients to do so. I was devastated. Out of all the cupcakes I’ve made in the past, I only had to redo the batter once. But the beauty of life, is that there can be second chances and when a second chance comes along, you don’t start from scratch but from experience. I ended up making a vanilla cupcake and infused it with my strawberry purée, adding in the mango lime compote in the middle. Next I trashed the frosting and made a new batch with just a plain cream cheese frosting. The second batch of cupcakes worked out perfectly, it paired well with the purée and compote and switching to a basic cream cheese frosting worked out in my benefit. Life throws curveballs and it’s easy to feel defeated. Things don’t always workout the first time around and that’s okay! It’s important to try and try again until we get it right. Sometimes second chances work out for the better. When we learn from our mistakes and press forward, we can accomplish anything. Keep going, keep learning, and never give up. #Bipolar1 #MentalHealth #Anxiety #MightyTogether

I wrote this poem carrying heavy grief in my heart and soul. Grief last a lifetime and in my deep sorrow, I write, I don't hide it away in the darkness, I shine light on it because it needs to be seen. I see your sorrow, too ❤️

-Eternal-

The eyes of heaven gaze down on wee
Beneath the starry sky
The whispers of the willow echos thy name
My heart releases a cry
I remember, I remember, I remember the love
Stained glass memory
Angel choir sings thereof
Painted images of past
Hast buried my mind unfree
Though dare not I paint over
But all is what connects mine to thee

#Grief #Bipolar1 #BipolarDepression #PTSD #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Depression #Addiction #AddictionRecovery #Caregiving

I wrote this poem carrying heavy grief in my heart and soul. Grief last a lifetime and in my deep sorrow, I write, I don't hide it away in the darkness, I shine light on it because it needs to be seen. I see your sorrow, too ❤️

-Eternal-

The eyes of heaven gaze down on wee
Beneath the starry sky
The whispers of the willow echos thy name
My heart releases a cry
I remember, I remember, I remember the love
Stained glass memory
Angel choir sings thereof
Painted images of past
Hast buried my mind unfree
Though dare not I paint over
But all is what connects mine to thee

#Grief #Bipolar1 #BipolarDepression #PTSD #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Depression #Addiction #AddictionRecovery #Caregiving

Hi my name is Silas. I’m new here someone recommended this sight for me. I tend to feel alone at night. Like I have no one to talk to. It’s just me, the voices in my head and my thoughts. I don’t have a lot of people to talk to at night most people are asleep. So I thought here might be a good place. I struggle with a lot and at night all I can do is overthink. And then I wake up and I put on a fake smile like nothing happened. #Bipolar2 #Bipolar1 #PTSD #ADHD #Anxiety

Hi my name is Silas. I’m new here someone recommended this sight for me. I tend to feel alone at night. Like I have no one to talk to. It’s just me, the voices in my head and my thoughts. I don’t have a lot of people to talk to at night most people are asleep. So I thought here might be a good place. I struggle with a lot and at night all I can do is overthink. And then I wake up and I put on a fake smile like nothing happened. #Bipolar2 #Bipolar1 #PTSD #ADHD #Anxiety