I take pictures - pictures of family, of friends, of life and of nature. Photographs replace words for me in more ways than one. I was looking through some of thousands of nature pictures I've taken this year. There is one of the gulf of Mexico, I was visiting my parents before all the craziness began. It looked calm. But in fact there were riptides that day, and a person could have easily been pulled in kicking and fighting. But the currents were so strong that no matter how hard they fought, the person would have been lost lost at sea. My thought, looking at that tonight, was that I'm holding on tight to a life tube, attached by a rope. I'm losing grip of the rope, and if I let it slip just a bit more I'm going to get sucked into the current and be lost forever. I'm trying so hard to hold on, but I'm out of energy. I want to give in and let the current take over,...I want to share this picture with my therapist. I've hinted around, I told her months ago, so will she see this as me just crying for attention if I share? I feel lost, exhausted and just want to give in