So I lost two friends to suicide in the same week in September 2018 , when I was 17. I've had suicidal thoughts of some sort since I was 13, mainly just wondering how people would react and if they'd miss me. On September 24, 2019, I actually made a suicide attempt. I'm doing better now, but I still struggle to a pretty severe extent. One of my biggest regrets is not doing more to ensure my death. The EMT's told me that if I had done one additional thing, I wouldn't have made it. While I'm somewhat happy, adore my amazing hubby, and we are excitedly trying for a baby, I still can't get it out of my head that it would have all been better if I had done more and succeeded. Can anyone relate? How do you get out of this mindset? #OurSideOfSuicide #SuicideSurvivor #regret #idontwanttofeellikethisanymore