I writen this many times. The thoughts run in my brain and won’t go away. Totay I saw that I’m done with the negative friendships. But today I’m still the one at fault for expressing my feelings to my mother in law in my room. Everyone can hear it no privacy for me. I can’t express myself without being told I’m wrong.
Now my husband wants to keep the peace and forcing me to make peace with sownboay who has caused me so much drama and hurt. Who says so steal all her stuff etc. she donated out we tried to sale it wouldn’t sale and told I’m jealous of her because I can’t take her hurting me anymore. I don’t care anymore about how she feels because she has made me feel so worthless and I can’t do anything.
I’m not listened to and my husband defends her saying I am jelaous and I can’t be alone and so on. She’s got him believing stupidness that isn’t true about his wife.
I refuse to talk to her don’t want her in my life anymore. They want to talk I’m done with it. I called my mother in law and she agreed that I don’t need this stress and my husband needs to see my feelings he only sees theirs because he won’t stop going up there (which he said he wouldn’t and I’m jealous for asking him to focus on his wife)
I’m feeling bad, but maybe I shouldn’t what do you think? Am I a horrible person for not doing it anymore. For noticing how much she wants her wishes respected but she doesn’t do it with me. Does this make me a bad person for saying I had enough I’m not doing this. Since we were six she did this to me. I don’t see how I am jealous really don’t have anything to be jealous about. I am not the reason stuff is happening to her but I have been her punching bag to long and my anxiety is through the roof. I just needed to be listened to not snapped at or told I’m wrong for having these feelings been told that even from my husband which hurts the most .
Help me I’m dying inside….
#helpme #needhelp #feelinghopeless #notme #ihatelifehere #livingwithahypercrite