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I just wanna scream

#scream is something that would feel #good right now... But will it #help ?? I have been #struggling a lot and it has not been the #best #Feeling ever. Tonight I went over my recent #Events of #Life and thought that perhaps I had fell behind somehow.

I am #Trying to see what is #True !

What can I do to feel better about this #Job life? (And trying to find something more meaningful).

Please #helpme

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How to even have more faith in society? | TW mentions of exclusionism, some swearing, some all caps

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I'm LGBTQ+. I'm transmasc non-binary. I'm otherkin (not human). I'm Black. I have autism (please don't call my autism a disorder/disability/syndrome) and anxiety, and someone with trauma. I cry very easily. I am overweight. I am a part of a plural/collective. I am non-romantically polyamorous. And every damn day, I feel like this world called society is just here to for the sole purpose to shit on others, betray others, or just to secretly judge others, including me.

Every day, it is getting much harder and harder to believe that there is a single damn individual out there (other than my current therapist, all of my partners, my dad, and a few friends) who has common sense, is open-hearted, is open-minded, and doesn't like to discriminate or invalidate others for being different or for experiencing different things, or labeling themselves differently. Sometimes, the anxiety gets to the point where it seems like going out is stupid for me. What's the point?

It's like almost every damn community I've been a part of (and left) and witnessed just LOVES to INVALIDATE OTHERS SOMEHOW?! It's so annoying and stupid and it's just like... why can't you just fucking accept someone for who they are??? All of this just makes me so fucking angry and just...!!

...Sigh. Now that that's off my chest... may I ask for advice on how to go about this? I already currently seeing a therapist, luckily. Right now, it is very very hard for me to get off this mindset because I believe it's true, sadly.. this society and all of other individuals' opinions is tearing me apart..

#MyAutismIsNotADisorder #MentalHealth #helpme #Vent #venting #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #anger #help #Society #Advice #triggerwarning #Neurodiversity #LGBTQIA #plural #otherkin

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The Dueling Mind

I hope you can relate to my PenUp Artwork from my Google tablet. It was a template that I colored to express how I am feeling constantly. It is a struggle to remain stable instead of getting stuck within the "ALL OR NOTHING" mentality. I wonder what on earth 🌎 I can do about it. Medicine 💊 helps, but it is not a cure, but just a treatment. I know many of you can relate to this picture. Surely I cannot be the only one dealing with this. I applied for disability as I keep running into the same issues that I have with every job. I lose myself in the world of depression (reduced energy, emotional mixed struggle) when there is not much to cause it situationally.

#helpme #MentalHealth #bipolarmind #BipolarDisorder #Trying #powerstruggle #Depression #PanicAttack #AnxietyAttack #PanicDisorder #AnxietyDisorder

28 reactions 6 comments
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Loneliness and paranoia

How does everyone combat the deafening loneliness? It feels like this dark abyss I have to actively try to push away. The second I let my brain relax or stop focusing on actively distracting myself, things start breaking down.

Also, what type of paranoid thoughts do you have and what age/time did you see these starting to begin?

#lonely #Bipolar2 #Paranoia #MentalHealth #helpme

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How to cope with regret? Guilt or what if thoughts 💭?

Recently going through a breakup, somewhat mutual but I brought up the fact that maybe we are going around in circles breaking up and getting back together, I had a bad panic attack/ crying I was stressed/ overwhelmed and they meant well to support me but were comparing me, saying I should be stronger, crying makes me weak etc, English isn’t their first language but they speak it well 🗣️, and I guess I was hurt because I know they meant well but it just made me feel more crappy and stigmatized, they kept going on and on and comparing me to other people etc. I know they loved me and were just concerned, but it sucks i feel regret though I feel in my gut it was problem for the best for both of us. But almost 3 years into a relationship
It’s still hard to let go. I’m proud of myself for doing a lot better than I expected but it’s hard when you get those emotional breakdowns and are just overwhelmed by everything and life in general.

#breakup #recovering #MentalHealth #Hurts #grieving #relationship #Ex
#healthybuttoxictoo #help #kindreminders #helpme #sad #Crying #Upset #Disappointed #regrets #dontknowwhattodo #isolated

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I can’t do this anymore

I writen this many times. The thoughts run in my brain and won’t go away. Totay I saw that I’m done with the negative friendships. But today I’m still the one at fault for expressing my feelings to my mother in law in my room. Everyone can hear it no privacy for me. I can’t express myself without being told I’m wrong.
Now my husband wants to keep the peace and forcing me to make peace with sownboay who has caused me so much drama and hurt. Who says so steal all her stuff etc. she donated out we tried to sale it wouldn’t sale and told I’m jealous of her because I can’t take her hurting me anymore. I don’t care anymore about how she feels because she has made me feel so worthless and I can’t do anything.
I’m not listened to and my husband defends her saying I am jelaous and I can’t be alone and so on. She’s got him believing stupidness that isn’t true about his wife.
I refuse to talk to her don’t want her in my life anymore. They want to talk I’m done with it. I called my mother in law and she agreed that I don’t need this stress and my husband needs to see my feelings he only sees theirs because he won’t stop going up there (which he said he wouldn’t and I’m jealous for asking him to focus on his wife)
I’m feeling bad, but maybe I shouldn’t what do you think? Am I a horrible person for not doing it anymore. For noticing how much she wants her wishes respected but she doesn’t do it with me. Does this make me a bad person for saying I had enough I’m not doing this. Since we were six she did this to me. I don’t see how I am jealous really don’t have anything to be jealous about. I am not the reason stuff is happening to her but I have been her punching bag to long and my anxiety is through the roof. I just needed to be listened to not snapped at or told I’m wrong for having these feelings been told that even from my husband which hurts the most .
Help me I’m dying inside….
#helpme #needhelp #feelinghopeless #notme #ihatelifehere #livingwithahypercrite

33 reactions 11 comments
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I have mental issues and my 18 yr old son has basically the same and more. Can anyone relate?ive been alone in this for many years.

I just found the afsp today, idk what to do but thx for having https://me.please help me i can't take much more.im a single mom of 4 adult kids my youngest Gabriel is 18,been dealing with so many different mental isses for so long that hes probably got a mental health disorder that noone knows about completely yet cuz its no joke taking care of him and i have basically and the same issues, therapist told me i need to take a break cuz im literally at that breaking point, so i guess im broken now just saying, cuz i feel of of my mind,stress and worry about hom and too many other emotions. But i cant take a break cuz im the only one that knows how to react or address his behaviors,hes such an angel and loves me his siblings, his one friend and our cats but theres something that takes over all the time and hes a different person. Hes never been diagnosed with multiple personalities but theres something different about his mental illness, but id like to know someonego throughthis but i have noone,i have one friend i talk to once A month, i stay home almost 24 7,im on disability for mental health and to much physical stuff to explain, im 48 ive been seing psychiatrist since i was 16 i was depressed and anorexic, im struggling with binge eating now,not the anorexia, im a fat pig and i hate myself for being disgusting anyway can anyone relate, im all alone,idk how to help h im m or if professionals somewhere can help. I cant afford a good psychiatrist, he sees the mental health clinic, hes fell through the cracks. I love my baby he needs me ti help him sorry so long but theres to much to explain it,much love and light to you all thx #helpme

9 reactions 4 comments
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I don’t get it…| Mentions of fleas

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Why are these stupid fleas still here?? Our cat has a flea collar on and it’s been 50-60 degrees. It’s cold on my room, and the one or two 70 degree days we’ve had in fall (that or because of the rain, a gnat comes out only in my room! Summer already sucked because of these stupid pests and it seriously drove me mad, and I just want them gone already! I’ve literally sprayed and have light traps and everything!

The worst part is that it’s just in my room, no one elses. Our cat barely has gone in my room, not even for that long. She hasn’t been in there since a month ago..

And we got her in 2019! I thought that fleas would’ve stopped appearing after the first infestation but apparently not! I don’t know what to do. Summer already drove me crazy and mad and so angry. I’m so sick of this, I just want it to stop already… /vneg

Any advice?

#helpme #Autism #anger #feelinghelpless #Idontknowwhattodo

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Sometimes… | TW slightly suicidal, mentions of guns, one swear #venting

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Sometimes.. this house makes me want to die. I just want to be away from it already. Even if it’s just my older sister disagreeing with my decisions regarding garbage bags… I’m only throwing the garbage out often to keep flies and gnats away. I’m only tying them to keep them away. And for my mental health. To this freaking day, she still has a problem with it, and it’s very annoying, and honestly - it hurts 😕

I’m so sick of being anxious over hearing her kids - um - “teasing” - and annoying each other.

Not to mention the fact that because of my mother’s anxiety about the Illinois bonding law (when in reality, me and my dad knew that it wasn’t going to be as bad as it seemed - psa: please do your own research and don’t listen to others), she may or may not get the liscence to get a gun a few months from now. She already took the legal classes. She may not even get the gun in the first place, but it still feels very icky and uncomfortable and I don’t want my friends or partners (plural) being here dealing with that shit.

Things would be so much better if we weren’t living here right now.

I just want to be out of here already… it’s been three freaking years since we’ve planned to move out… but I hope it’ll be faster, especially after Dad heard about what Mom was doing. He doesn’t feel safe with me regarding her decision, and neither do I.

#SuicidalIdeation #helpme #Stress #Anxiety #Autism #frustrated

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I need help

I have bipolar affective disorder. I have been on medication for 8 years. But I'm not happy. I am worried about my future and many debts from the manic phase of the illness. I am asking for prayers. Thanks for every thought and prayer and space to talk. Thank you also for your experience, you are all everyday heroes. Thanks and I keep my fingers crossed for you, may you be successful and happy. #Bipolar #helpme #godisgoodallthetime

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