Myfeelingsarereal

Today I am angry and hurting. I feel lost and confused. Over thinking is doing my head in #Bpdisexhausting

Last night I am sitting at dinner with my family and in laws, my husband starts making jokes about how he doesn’t get a hot lunch for work every day because I don’t cook. This is an ongoing joke and has been for a while now. There are days where it doesn’t bother me, however, last night was not one of those nights. The more they continued to joke, the more heated I got until I finally decided to excuse myself and go upstairs. As I was walking up stairs I heard my mother in law yell after me "I don’t know why you get so upset. You shouldn’t let it bother you." Usually I don’t respond but I decided to shout back that it’s hard. But why is it hard? I can remember feeling like this my entire life and everyone telling me that I was always over reacting. Let me say this for the people in the back who are still ignorant to mental illnesses. I AM NEVER OVER REACTING. My mind does not work like yours and I will not apologize for that. I will not apologize for my emotions being "over the top." This is who I have always been and it has taken me 28 long, untreated years to finally realize that I have never over reacted, I have simply reacted the only way my broken mind would let me. Please stop telling your loved ones with mental illnesses that they are reacting in a way that isn’t normal, because to them it’s the only way they know how. #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Depression #Anxiety #Myfeelingsarereal