positiveity

At the age of 18 I was diagnosed with something I had never even heard of. Complex regional pain syndrome, it was terrifying. The doctors said I has probably been dealing with it for at least another 2 to 3 years prior. 6 years later and I'm still dealing with it, as I always will. I've had to except it as my fate. It all started in my right knee, by this point in time it has spread to my hips down. All this time I have kept up working. I've held multiple jobs. Some I was o ly able to hold during brief remission periods, but come every fall as the biometric pressure changes and the weather cools it comes roaring back reminding me that those nags I felt all summer were waiting to explode. Almost ways causing a spread. This time around crps which had always had a mind of it's own has decided it wants to mess with my upper extremities, I find it difficult to do even the basics of holding a phone or controller, let alone all the things my work requires. Pride has kept me from throwing in the towel though many times I want to. At this point I wear a boot on my foot because without it my foot breaks from walking. My knees each have a bulky brace and my wrist practically has a removable cast. I am 24. The sentence I hear to often, "quit dying" or "your to young to be in pain". I was to young 8 years ago. Now I have a failing body with doctors to scared to prescribe me anything more than ibuprofen. Something g I gave up years ago after I came to the point of taking close to 6000 milligrams a day, dealing with the worlds most painful disease known to man according to the McGill painscale.

My post isnt to complain though. My goal was to share my story. In Hope that anyone else dealing with this monster can get through another day knowing there are others out there who fight this internal war every day to. It is real and the fight is in our head. Because at the end of the day our worst enemy is ourselves. I take everything out on myself. I should've done more, remembered more, slept less, worked out or something. Staying positive withourselves is the hardest thing we can do everyday. But being negative, as easy as it can be, will only make your day worse. So no matter what you do. Your daily battle can best be won, when your on your own side.
#ComplexRegionalPainSyndrome #positiveity #storytime #takethatcrps #wearewarriors #ChronicPain #dontgiveup