3 Truths Survivors of Childhood Abuse Deserve to Hear

For years, I believed the lies.

My childhood was filled with a mixture of abuse, fear and the belief that I could never really be lovable, by anyone. Not if they knew all of me and what had happened. So, I hid who I really was, and what had really happened. But I have realized some things lately. And though it has taken many years, it is not too late.

• What is PTSD?

So, I wrote this list to remind myself.

Here are three truths survivors of childhood abuse deserve to know.

1. You are beautiful.

You are beautiful, despite how low you have fallen, in the midst of your attempts to overcome your past. You are important, despite of that feeling inside of worthlessness. You are lovely, despite your body having been abused. You are valuable, despite how he tried to degrade you. You are worth everything you ever thought you weren’t. You are smart, despite the fear that you somehow “invited” the abuse. You are precious, in God’s eyes and in mine, despite no one having convinced you of that before.

2. You deserve happiness.

You can have happiness, despite having always believed it was a myth from the abyss of depression. You are sensitive, and it is a strength, despite others seeing it as a weakness and taking advantage of it. You are kind, and it is special, despite you having been deceived by those you have been kind to in the past. Vulnerability is a virtue that someone who loves you can be trusted with, despite the high and strong walls you have built up to protect yourself. You deserve praise, attention and compliments, freely given, despite it always feeling like you had to work so hard for it.

3. You are lovable.

Nothing you can do could ever separate you from real love, despite having been convinced you deserve it less than others do. You are worthy of being loved, despite having been convinced you have fallen short of its requirements somehow. You are enough, just the way that you are, despite always having tried to hide who you are. You deserve to discover the good in who you are, regardless of the fact that you may fail sometimes along the journey of discovery.

Some people are incapable of the love you always wished for, despite you thinking and hoping you could change that. But, you are loved, even if it doesn’t come from the places you always thought you needed it to come from. You are lovable, despite feeling their love was lacking because of you.

It wasn’t you — it was them.

I know some of these things are hard to believe. Regardless, I felt you deserved to know your worth, your truth and your value. You deserve a chance to believe the truth now, despite having believed the rest for far too long.