I'm frustrated with myself. I know, the title says that, duh. But relationships are one of those areas in which I feel like I am an abject failure. I'm a 36yo cis female, employed full time, have my own home, and have my life somewhat figured out. But I feel like I'm only ever picking mates where the relationships never work out. I think I need some sort of therapy to help me sort out why I do what I do, and help me stop my patterns. I started studying attachment theory, reading about codependency and abusive relationships, and I'm starting to feel like I'm some sort of lost cause. It's past the point where I think about having a family or having kids. I had 3 long term relationships in my past not work out and I'm starting to feel like it's too late for me. My biggest fears are a) being alone or b) being with the wrong person. I've been with the wrong person multiple times and I am just losing faith that I deserve someone. I feel like there's something fundamentally wrong with me.