When trying to leave an emotionally abusive relationship, will the abuser attempt to do whatever might draw you back in to or keep you dependent on them and the relationship, to keep you attached/stuck?
And how does this behavior differ from what people might do in a non-abusive relationship that is ending? You know, whenever a relationship ends that someone wish would continue, they do things to try to not lose the person/relationship.
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I find it fascinating how my memories flow, they aren't constant but can be triggered,controlled and be decompartmentalized, so easily. But, they serve purpose in protection now. Since people are not willing to be forthcoming with me, I write.
One relationship, Ive had to greive, three years later. I am blown away by one person's role,in my life. I believed in it.
I can now, look and see, all the little traits I saw, as enduring, they were someone https://elses.And when that connected, holy https://epiphany.Huge BIG Bang Moment! Sadness and https://shock.And to know, those same traits, we're a catapult to her, entire existence, in my life! And I, was played, for https://years.Bravo peeps.
From taste in clothes,music,art,fool,nature,hobbies, omg the hobby list is wacko to me https://now.Everything.How could someone have that much influence on another....BOOM!HOLY COW!!!Im hysterical over https://this.YEARS OF INFLUENCE MOLDED her.wtf
And that it was still going on! HOLY MOLLY BATMAN GET THE JOKER,LETS https://ROLL.And that her whole world, was paired up for life, with another, for those qualities!!!! So he fell for HIM, not HER! EVERYTHING HE LOVED,about her, WAS HIS influence.
Vomit time!!!
AND SHE, TOLD YOU, EVERYTHING.
Now I understand the years of being that "friend",on the https://sidelines.Why she was, that way.it was, one sided.
I kept her secrets, while she told https://mine.And that is why, she stayed, because I knew hers.
My existence has provided hours of entertainment, for https://many.You are https://welcome.I would have given details if https://asked.Could of really laughed.
But she only knew, of her own projection herself, poor thing.
Her entire personality,was his.
Now I understand the panick,when my mask https://fell.I was stripped,couldnt lie.
https://Damn.Someones entire idea of me was presented through gossip and https://disloyalty.Nothing https://new.And I respected this person,kept their secrets and gave them space, support,faith and belief, https://always.I defended these people behind their backs.Seriously, what the fck is wrong with people!
And since Ive been pushed, into the dark, all the players are clear now and Im curious like a https://cat.I find it comical and I find it ironically familiar https://now.All for a lesson. What was the plan, really, she will be gone, she'll never know or find https://out.Seriously flawed https://plan.All bases covered, huh?
Knowing what I know now,how desperate, did she pay the price,yes. I phased myself out, I knew.
Did she loose me, yes.do I know all their secrets, no. But enough, to know I had, to remove https://myself.It was clear as https://day.All the games.
Would I tell? Why https://not.I have nothing to https://loose.When you find those around you, held zero loyalty to you. And it was celebrated. Then it is fair game, right? I do not need to make things https://up.I tell what is, what has happened.
Unbelievably, grateful to have been made a fool of.
Thank you but you cannot run a game, on someone that KNOWS.
Hi, my name is LouieLou12345. I'm here because
I just lost mom with Alzheimer’s. Sisters did not help and it has changed our relationship which was already shaky. Am grief stricken. Divorced no kids.#MightyTogether #Grief #Fibromyalgia
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I've been seeing my partner for 3 weeks and the relationship is intense at times. He opened up and told me he has bpd and a past but he says he goes to groups, mens walks and talks and other things to help him manage symptoms. I'm proud of him and I do like him a lot. But, I have a fear of abandonment and attachment issues myself with depression and a lot of anxiety. I don't want to end up in a dependency relationship and I'm trying to be careful, open and honest. I have done a lot of research and continue to learn about his condition, I know with his behaviour I'm his favourite person and I've told him countless times to not put me on a pedastool, but I'm frightened for when he devalues our relationship. I'm a very sensitive person and can take mean things to heart easily, I'm unsure of how to handle this if this is how he reacts.
We have had talks about my past too, that I have been in abusive relationships and have trust issues, we had a discussion about me and that it may take me longer to catch up to where he is in the relationship and I have asked him to have patience.... But he dropped the 'I love you' already and Im not there yet, but I felt pressured into saying it back. I do really like him a lot and I want to see where this goes but I'm scared to tell him that I'm not there yet. I don't want to break his heart and I'm definitely in it for the long haul but now I feel guilty. How do I handle this delicately without triggering his fear of abandonment and let him know I still want him to be with me
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When consumed by the depths and darkness of depression, finding hope can feel daunting and even impossible altogether. The weight of depression can shift how you perceive and experience the world. Life becomes filtered through a lens of heaviness and hopelessness, which can make it difficult to feel that things could ever be different. In the grip of depression, it's often hard to see what there is to look forward to. It can sometimes seem like every day is going to be more of the same emptiness and difficulty to locate the path through.
Hope Retreats During Depression
When depression has taken over, affirmations and certain self-talk, such as telling yourself to “stay positive”, or other similar ones, are generally unhelpful. This is because positive self-talk in the midst of internal darkness and pain tends to misalign with the psychological and emotional state that you're caught in. Hope is not something you summon through willpower. It's quite difficult to take a "just do it" approach with hope (even if you can push yourself to get out of bed and move through your day). The general ability to see and feel optimistic about the future becomes compromised during depression. It isn't so much that your mind and body are refusing to hope. Instead, it's more like it has temporarily lost access to the feeling of hope and how to find it.
Therefore, restoring hope isn't about forcing an immediate shift. It's less like flipping a switch and more like caring for a garden that needs a nurturing environment to begin to grow again. It’s a gradual process.
Depression And Disconnection
Depression often comes from a variety of factors. Sometimes it slowly develops over time starting from early experiences where your emotional needs may not have been met, leaving a sense of internal emptiness. Other times, it may be a response from more recent losses: a relationship, loss of identity, or missing a sense of purpose. Depression can also be the result of past trauma that is being carried, whether more recent, or even further in the past. And more.
When depressed, it's common to experience a strong sense of disconnection from the world, others, and even from yourself. You might have difficulty connecting with things that once brought you meaning or satisfaction. Things that used to be motivating or exciting now may feel purposeless or irritating, etc. Even your feelings can become numb and your thoughts may seem different -- darker, negative, etc. This feeling of disconnection can make it very difficult to feel excited or hopeful about the future or life in general.
Creating Space for Reconnection
Depression is a state that needs attention, even when a part of you may want to push any attention or care away (which is common response during depression). The shame that people often experience when depressed can actually make it harder to reconnect and find a sense of hope. Shame can lead to self-blame and to beating yourself down simply for struggling in the first place. It may feel like you shouldn't be struggling, but are anyway, which can be a frustrating feeling.
When working with people in therapy for depression, part of the process is aiming to understand what this psychological and emotional state might be communicating or responding to. For example, depression can sometimes be a way of unconsciously expressing that important parts of your life are not in sync. Perhaps you’ve been storing and carrying difficult emotions or ignoring your own needs for too long. Or, maybe you've been feeling neglected, alone, trapped, sad, or like no one understands you or what you deal with and there isn't room for the support you need.
As you are more able to reflect on your emotional experiences and connect with what's underlying the heaviness and darkness, it becomes more possible to release the weight of the depression and restore a sense of hope.
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When you need support or a listening ear, someone to chat with or call, an accountability buddy, or a partner for arts, crafts, or hobbies, who do you turn to? What makes that person feel comforting or safe for you?
If no one comes to mind right now, that’s totally OK. Instead, feel free to share what types of spaces or circumstances help you feel comfortable. What about those environments helps you feel safe to be yourself?
Mighty staffer @sparklywartanks feels most comfortable around her mom, sister, and the new friends she made this year. It’s taken time for her to feel at ease with others after being hurt growing up, but she’s been brave in opening herself up to new experiences.
Share what comfort in relationships or spaces looks like for you! 💫
#MightyMinute #CheckInWithMe #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Disability #RareDisease #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Autism #Parenting #PTSD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BipolarDisorder #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #EatingDisorders #Depression #Fibromyalgia #Lupus #MultipleSclerosis #Migraine #Spoonie
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Hi, my name is JDG1983. I'm here because i am (trying to) exiting relationship in which i think was BPD ..with big jelousy and crazy moments...but still i see so much good....i am scared
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Hi, my name is StormyDragon5044. I'm here because my ex-husband has bipolar disorder, and there were times when he didn’t take his medication. During those periods, he experienced manic episodes, which included impulsive, unpredictable, and sometimes hurtful behavior. These episodes were very stressful for me and triggered my anxiety, making it hard to feel safe or secure in our relationship.
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